Paulson Texas holdem Poker chips Review - fieldlines.net

Hi, everybody. My name is Sid, and I’m an addict.
It took me a long time to accept that. But when you take a job in a casino just so that you can be there all the time and try to gain an edge, you’re an addict. It’s obvious even to me. More so to my family and friends, who I barely see anymore.
It’s not pills or coke, booze or heroin that I’m hooked on. I’m addicted to gambling.
The casino that made me so obsessed is not an ordinary one, though. It’s far from ordinary.
You don’t play for money at Fantasy Casino. You play for your dreams.
I hear you laughing.
But have you ever had a really, really great dream? One that got so good you snapped awake the second it started to get really excellent?
Well, imagine that times a thousand. Times a million.
A dream so real and so perfect that all of your fantasies become reality. Time stretches out. You feel like you are there forever. A lifetime passes before your return.
Infinite wealth, the ability to fly like superman, you’re surrounded by sex and beautiful people all day as you relax in a palace built to your mind’s most exacting specifications of perfection.
But then you wake up, and in an instant it is gone.
The power, the wealth, the endless sex and supernatural powers.
Everything is suddenly NORMAL again.
And so you go back to the casino.
I went back to the casino.
But the problem with gambling is that you don’t always win. And when you lose, suddenly the winnings are gone as well, vanished without a trace. All I knew was that I had to have that feeling again.
So I went inside the giant building and then followed the secret signs which led to a door that led to a staircase going downwards.
I went down the stairs and knocked on the door marked “Private” and waited for an answer.
“Password.”
The voice on the other side of the black door waited for my response.
“Seramth Gin.” I said the unnatural words carefully and deliberately, still not knowing their meaning.
A friend had told me the password, a fellow gambler who I would later find dead in his apartment. His corpse white, bloated, and maggot-infested.
His eyes were black and filled with blood which streamed from his eye sockets like tears. He had bit his tongue clean off and his fingernails were found lodged in various surfaces throughout his apartment. Like he had been trying to claw his way out of a steel box that only he could see.
But I’m getting ahead of myself. That was later. At this point I was still hopeful for another wonderful dream. Still thankful for his advice to seek out the place.
The door opened and I walked inside. It was the same as it had been the day before, only less busy at this time – still early afternoon.
I approached the table I had been sitting at the night before.
Poker – Texas Hold ‘em: Ten dream limit – the sign read.
The rules were simple. You got a stack of chips. If you doubled them, you received a dream. If you lost them, you lost a dream.
I wasn’t concerned about losing dreams yet, I still didn’t understand exactly what that meant.
When I lost my first stack of chips, I quickly bought in again. And again. And again.
Pretty soon I realized I had lost eight dreams with no winnings whatsoever. I was in a slump. A losing streak.
I decided to go home and count my losses. Literally, since I had no idea what that even meant.
As I got up to leave the table, the dealer looked at me. His eyes were remorseless and cold.
“See the cashier on your way out,” he said, handing me eight black chips.
I gulped and walked over to the glass window where the cashier sat waiting. Handing him the eight chips, he raised his eyebrows and clicked his tongue.
“That’s a shame. Hold out your hand please.”
Two men in black suits came up behind me suddenly and stood on either side of me, intimidating in their stature and demeanour.
I did as he asked and held out my hand with the palm facing up.
The cashier pulled out a strange-looking device from beneath the counter. It had a vial of vermillion-coloured liquid at the top that was attached to the rest of it which resembled a gun with a hypodermic needle at the end.
I screamed and tried to pull away, but the two men grabbed me and held my arm through the window. Thrashing and elbowing them, I tried to get away but it was useless.
The cashier injected the stuff into my veins quickly and it felt cold and slimy going through my system. I could feel it suddenly in my heart, turning it cold and then up into my mind and my lungs and all extremities causing me to shake and violently seize. I writhed on the floor, blood pouring from my ears and my eyes.
Finally the feeling settled down into a numbness that prickled the insides of my blood vessels. It wasn’t until later, once I realized what the casino really was, that I found out what they had done.
I went home with the certainty that they had injected me with something. If winning had resulted in the greatest dream I had ever had – essentially an almost never-ending fantasy – what would happen after a loss?
Nightmares. That was what it would be. I was sure of it.
I settled into bed that night and closed my eyes, drifting off to sleep quickly after such an emotionally exhausting afternoon.
As soon as my eyes closed, they opened again and it was morning.
It felt as if I had not slept at all. My mind was fuzzy and it was difficult to focus. My eyes wanted to close again but my alarm was telling me that it was time to get up for work, so I hit the “dismiss” button and hopped in the shower.
I threw on my clothes and went out the door. At work I noticed a few people looking at me strangely, but I didn’t realize until someone pointed it out to me that my shirt was on inside-out. At this point I was still working in an office doing commodities trading and such lapses were frowned upon.
If you couldn’t focus enough to put your shirt on properly in the morning, how could you focus enough to get the work done in such a demanding environment? Millions of dollars changing hands with each transaction meant that such trivial things were put under a magnifying glass and coupled with other subsequent mistakes each following day after that, I found myself in the boss’s office by the end of the week being handed my walking papers.
Desperate for rest after days of not feeling any benefit from sleep, I went back to the casino.
They knew just by looking at me how to dig their claws in further. After a couple hours I had managed to win myself a dream.
They handed me the complimentary cocktail as they had the time before. I hadn’t realized the significance of it and still didn’t, despite the unusual vermillion colour of the drink. I swallowed it in one gulp and went out the door practically dancing and clicking my heels, ready to go home and feel rested again.
My dream that night was wonderful. Everything I had hoped for in many ways.
But not as good as the first time. I wanted that feeling back again.
Knowing that it was a dream the whole time and realizing that it was going to end seemed to shorten the fantasy, made it seem hollow and manufactured.
If I could win again maybe it would be like that first time, I thought.
The casino drew me in again and again. I found myself a zombie most days, exhausted, at my wit’s end. Ready to call it quits for good and say goodbye.
But then I would win again and it would all seem to be alright for a while.
My debt kept growing and growing with nearly every trip. The hypodermic needle would be plunged into my skin and every time they had to hold me down. Every time I would feel a little more empty. A little more hollow.
Waking up every day began to feel the same. Nothing had definition or purpose.
“You’re here all the time,” one of the goons whispered to me as they shot the needle into my vein the time after that. “Haven’t you figured it out yet? You should just get a job here and then at least you’ll be in on the secret.”
I applied the next day and got an interview with the boss. I would find out later that if you got someone to apply there you got a one dream bonus.
In his office, the well-dressed man was sitting behind a massive polished ebony desk. The room was adorned with paintings, sculptures, and other high-priced artwork. He had photos everywhere of himself shaking hands with world leaders, new and old, for hundreds of years.
His face never changed. Never aged.
“So, you want to work with us? Tired of dreamless nights without end? You want to have some relief, is that it?”
“Yes. Please. Anything. I’ve been coming here for so long and it’s an endless cycle. I want back what I’ve lost but I keep finding myself more and more in debt with each visit.”
“Ah, so do you understand it now, then? What the ‘injections’ are?”
It finally dawned on me, sitting there. Not injections at all. They weren’t putting something in us. They were taking something out. The vermillion-coloured liquid in the vials – our dreams.
“If I take a job with you, will the same rules apply? Will they still take my sleep, my rest, every time I lose?”
“Yes. We can’t have the employees living by different rules than everyone else. But we will give you an alternative injection, so that you feel well-rested when you come in for your shift.”
“I’ll do it. I need to rest. I need to get some meaningful sleep. My life has been miserable ever since coming here.”
“Well, I can’t promise that this will help,” he said, getting up from his desk with a hypodermic gun in his hand. The vial of fluid sitting atop this one was jet-black and looked evil and poisonous. He rolled up his sleeves as he primed it and I watched a few beads of it drip oil-like out of the tip of the needle.
“What the hell is that!? I don’t want that stuff in me!”
“But you need to sleep, my dear worker. I can’t have you passing out at the blackjack table like a narcoleptic! You agreed to this, after all. You wanted to rest, and the only way for that to happen is for you to have SOME sort of dream. Not everyone is as lucky as you, you know. To have that wonderful vermillion fluid in your veins. Some people come to us begging to take it from them. Some of our employees for example, the ones who do the recruitment for us, are full of this black stuff.”
“What?” I had gotten up from the chair and was backing away from him towards the door. But I found it was locked as he approached.
“First you have to tell me the password, Sid.”
“Seramth Gin.” I said the words that I had said every time to gain access to the casino, only this time I pictured the letters and rearranged them in my mind.
“Nightmares.”
He smiled as he injected me with the vial of black hate, and it went into my veins feeling hot and unpleasant. I began to sweat and the beads of it turned cold on my skin as I shivered.
I’ll sleep tonight. I might even wake up feeling rested. But as long as I live and work at that casino, I’ll be afraid to dream again. Because now my unconscious hours are occupied by the most terrifying experiences imaginable. Nightmares beyond imagining in their awfulness. That is my fate.
Unless… Just maybe, I can win one more time.
JG
TCC

I made a list of every Unus Annus video name. Posting this here because someone wanted to see it and a comment doesn't allow more than 1000 characters.
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November 15th - Unus Annus
(note- The Very Start.)
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November 15th - Cooking with Sex Toys
(note- 365 Days Left)
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November 16th - Purging Our Sins with a Net Pot
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November 17th - Hot Dog'd to Death
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November 18th - Making Our Own Sensory Deprivation Tank
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November 19th - The Good Kind of Cupping
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November 20th - The Bad Kind of Cupping
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November 21st - The Worst Kind of Cupping
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November 22nd - Ethan Will Be Kicked in the Balls
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November 23rd - Doing Each Other's Makeup in the Dark
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November 24th - Baby Hands Operation
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November 25th - Mark and Ethan Summon a Ghost
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November 26th - 2 Truths and 1 Lie -- Waxing Edition
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November 27th - Poopsie Sparkly Critters (a slime surpise...)
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November 28th - Play-Doh Thanksgiving
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November 29th - Helium Therapy
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November 30th - Drawing Memes From Memory
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December 1st - 1 Man 100 Accents
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December 2nd - An A.I. Predicts How We're Going to Die
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December 3rd - Mark Turns Ethan into a Mummy to Prepare Him for the Great Beyond
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December 4th - The Cubby Gummy Challenge
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December 5th - We Buy a Professional Hypnosis Video and React To It
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December 6th - Mark and Ethan Attempt and Escape Room
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December 7th - Ethan Destroys Mark's Van with a Bat
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December 8th - There's Still Hope...
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December 9th - Ethan Gives Mark a Viking Funeral
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December 10th - The Great Meat Mistake
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December 11th - Acupuncture Is NOT Painful
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December 12th - Floating in a Real Sensory Deprivation Tank
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December 13th - Mark Reviews The Impossible Burger But There's a Looming Sense of Impending Doom
(note- Paintball gun)
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December 14th - We Made Nude Pictures of Eachother
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December 15th - You made Beautiful Music for The Barrel... But Only One Could Win
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December 16th - We Had To Drink Each Other's Pee
(note- The first of the Pee Trilogy)
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December 17th - Ethan Explores Mark's Haunted Basement
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December 18th - Giving Away Our 1,000,000 Subscriber Gold Play Button
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December 19th - Ethan's Relaxing and Totally Normal Naul Salon
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December 20th - Taped and Afraid
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December 21st - What Was The Most Painful Thing We've Ever Endured?
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December 22nd - Donating Toys to charity w/ JackSepticEye
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December 23rd - Harnessing Our Dogs' Unlimited Energy
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December 24th - Santa's Mukbang (Drinking 1 Gallon of Eggnog)
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December 25th - Forcibly Turning Mark Into Santa Claus Against His Will
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December 26th - Preserving Ourselves In Wax
(note- JackSepticEye was also here!)
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December 27th - Beating Inanimate Objects to Death
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December 28th - Emotional Pain vs Physical Pain... Which is worse?
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December 29th - Duct Tape Crusifixion (Amy, Please Don't Watch This Video)
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December 30th - You Blink You Lose
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December 31th - 2 Grown Men Attempt the Presidential Fitness Test
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January 1st - We Took The Polar Plunge
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Janurary 2nd - Hiding Out Sins from Amy's Holy Peepers
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January 3rd - We Eat Bugs
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January 4th - DIY Bungee Jump (Please don't try this)
(note- Disclamer Song Origin)
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January 5th - We Have The BEST Thumbnails on Youtube and No One Can Tell Us Otherwise
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January 6th - Who Can Make Themselves Taller?
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January 7th - The Sensory Overload Tank
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January 8th - Recreating Ourselves as a Cursed Mannequin
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January 9th - We Took an IQ Test
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January 10th - Ethan Fianlly Becomes a MAN
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January 11th - Mark and Ethan Go Casket Shopping
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January 12th - We Take a Lie Detector Test to Uncover Our Darkest Sins
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January 13th - Learning to Breathe Underwater
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January 14th - Fixing Mark's Hole with Ramen but Every Time We Add Glue We Get 5% Closer to God
(note- The hole made in the video where Mark punched a hole in the wall)
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January 15th - Mark Steals Ethan's Face
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January 16th - You Breathe You Die
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January 17th - 2 Absolute Beginners Experience the Dancing Glory that is Salsa
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January 18th - DIY Geriatric Simulator
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January 19th - This Is How We'll Die...
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January 20th - We Cryogenically Freeze Ourselves
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January 21st - This is What Being Tased Feels Like
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January 22nd - What Happens When A Youtube Channel Dies?
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January 23rd - Bad Bad Beans
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January 24th - We hired a Real Hypnotherapist to Analyze Our Darkest Dreams
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January 25th - We Turned Our Bodies Into Art
(note- painting each other naked)
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January 26th - Mark and Ethan Lean About The Human Body
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January 27th - Mark Punishes Ethan
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January 28th - Strange (and legal) Things You Can Do With Your Body After Death
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January 29th - DIY Cheese
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January 30th - Hacking The Very Fabric of the Universe
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January 31st - Looking at Long Lost Memes
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February 1st - Discovering the Secret to Eternal Life
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February 2nd - Turning Mark Into an E-Boy
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February 3rd - Ethan Redefines Male Beauty
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February 4th - Professional Fire Cupping (Going Even Further Beyond)
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February 5th - An Extremely Sour, Not-at-all Sour Meal
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February 6th - Literally Eating Fire
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February 7th - Unregulated Axe Throwing
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February 8th - Literally Laying On Broken Glass
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February 9th - Making an Indoor Tornado to Flex on Mother Nature
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February 10th - Nutball: The Most Dangerous Game
(note- First of the Nutball Trilogy)
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February 11th - Becoming a Master of Mime
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February 12th - Discussing the Idea of Murdering Each Other bit It's Just a Joke and Definitely Not Serious Haha
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February 13th - Are We Already Dead?
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February 14th - Our Perfect (and last) Valentine's Day
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February 15th - Drunk College Party Simulator
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February 16th - 10 Strange Amazon Paroducts Ethan Bought Mark Because He Doesn't Know How To Spend Money Responsibly
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February 17th - Chickens Teach Us About Life and Death
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February 18th - 3 Big Boys Attempt the Kings Royal Fitness Test
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February 19th - Being Attacked by a Fully Trained Bodyguard Dog
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February 20th - Learning the Ancient Art of Chinese Archery
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February 21st - The Ultimate Trolley Problem
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February 22nd - Goat Yoga
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February 23rd - Edible Slime was a Mistake
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February 24th - Granting Acces Into Heaven's Sweet Gates
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February 25th - Long Hair, Do We Dare?
(note- With Marks Quarintine Hair, yes, he did dare)
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February 26th - We Wrote a Hit Pop Song in 30 Minutes
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February 27th - Mark and Ethan go on a "Drum Date"
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February 28th - Blowing Our Souls Into Some Hot Glass
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February 29th - Top 10 Worst Things Your Friend Could Possibly Spend Their Money On
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March 1st - Nutball Extreme: Taser Edition
(note- Second of the Nutball Trilogy)
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March 2nd - REAL Ghost Hunting at an Abandoned Zoo
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March 3rd - We Bought a Camera That Can Look Inside Us
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March 4th - Becoming the World's Greatest DJs
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March 5th - Who Can Teach Their Dog a Trick the Fastest?
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March 6th - Middle School Science Experiment Teaches Us About Life and Death
(note- Owl pellets)
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March 7th - DIY Chiropractor
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March 8th - Mark and Ethan Get Into a Fight
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March 9th - The Barrel - Offical Music Video
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March 10th - We Got Pepper Sprayed
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March 11th - We Give Each Other Tattoos Blindfolded
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March 12th - What Does Astrology Say About Our Friendship?
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March 13th - Mark and Ethan Get a Full Body Scan to See What Secrets Lay Hidden Within (and learn their body fat)
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March 14th - Mark Needs To Rub Ethan and Only His Mom Can Help Him
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March 15th - 2 Idiots Get Crushed by 18-Foot Giant Snakes
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March 16th - Beer Sauna: Turning a Portable Sauna into a Portable Hell
(note- The video where Pee Sauna was first mentioned)
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March 17th - Mark and Ethan Hunt The World's Most Wanted Criminals
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March 18th - Unus Annus Carves the Roast Beast
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March 19th - 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death
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March 20th - We Tried a Labor Pain Simulator
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March 21st - Recreating the Miracle of Childbirth
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March 22nd - Mark and Ethan Are Now Fathers
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March 23rd - We Force James Charles to Run a Military Obstacle Course
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March 24th - Desperately Trying To Not Touch Our Faces
(note- Start of Quarintine videos)
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March 25th - Reddit 50/50: Two Player Edition
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March 26th - Going on an Internet Scavenger Hunt
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March 27th - Having an Adventure In VR Chat Becuase We Can't Go Outside
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March 28th - Amazon Shopping for the Apocalypse
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March 29th - Whom Would Eat Whomst First in a Zombie Apocalypse?
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March 30th - Ultimate Youtuber Boxing Showdown
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March 31st - The Deep End of Omegle: Risky Boogalo
(note- This video was deleted for an unknown reason)
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April 1st - Where in the World is Unus Annus?
(note- Timer was at 401 days)
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April 2nd - Mark Builds a Pillow Fort for the Very First Time
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April 3rd - Mark's 1 Weird Talent Leaves Ethan Absolutely Speechless
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April 4th - Wikifeet: A Tale of 2 Tootsies
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April 5th - We Made Every YouTuber Battle in the Hunger Games
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April 6th - We Google Each Other to Find Our Darkest Forgotten Sins
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April 7th - We Played Mad Libs and Ran It Through Google Translate
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April 8th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Try and Nae a Single State in the USA
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April 9th - Speed Reading 1000+ WPM To Gain a Complete Understanding of All Human Knowledge
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April 10th - What is the Least Viewed Video on YouTube
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April 11th - We Found Websites That The World Forgot About
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April 12th - The Scariest True Stories on the Internet
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April 13th - How to NOT be the Perfect Boyfriend
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April 14th - Mark and Ethan Find The Lost City of EL Dorado
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April 15th - Mark and Ethan Bet Everything on a Wikipedia Race
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April 16th - The Creepiest Videos on Youtube
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April 17th - Help Us Break a YouTube World Record
(note- The birth of Norbert Moses. The video was called "Subscribe to Norbert Moses")
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April 18th - 2 Men 200 Accents
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April 19th - The Illuminati... Do They Really Exist?
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April 20th - Using Google Maps to Find the Lost City of Atlantis
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April 21st - Reading YOUR Scariest True Stories
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April 22nd - Mark and Ethan Take a Personality Test
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April 23rd - Will AI Soon Take Over Humanity As We Know It?
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April 24th - Running Internet Drama through Google Translate
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April 25th - The Secret Unus Annus NO-Touchy-Touchy Hand Shake
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April 26th - Two Male Men Judge Female Women on Their Beauty
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April 27th - Bored? Press This Button.
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April 28th - Don't Go in the Ocean... Ever.
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April 29th - We Explore the Most MYSTERIOUS Mysteries of our Wildy Mysterious Mystery Moon of Mysteries
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April 30th - We Looked at Unus Annus Memes
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May 1st - Is Mark a Masochist?
(note- yes.)
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May 2nd - What the Hell is a Pink Trombone?
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May 3rd - Professional Fetish Scientists Rank the Best/Worst Fetishes of 2020
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May 4th - Mark and Ethan Desperately Attempt to Feel Something
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May 5th - An A.I. Generates Out Worst Nightmare
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May 6th - Are Reptilian Humanoids Living Among us?
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May 7th - Like It or Not... This is What The New Human Looks Like
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May 8th - Eating Only Onions for 24 Hours: How Many Onions Does it Take to Kill a Man?
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May 9th - Unus Annus ASMR
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May 10th - We Attempted to Create THICC Water
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May 11th - Making Our Own Gravestones to Prepare For Our Inevitable Demise
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May 12th - How Tall Can A Human Get?: An Impartial Review by 2 Average Height Men
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May 13th - Mark Teaches Ethan Korean
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May 14th - Bigfoot is Real and It Ate My Friend
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May 15th - The End of Unus Annus is Almost Here...
(note- The Halfway point)
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May 16th - We Explore the Unus Annus Subreddit for Your Delicious Memes
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May 17th - How Big Can a Nuke Get?
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May 18th - How Much Caffeine Does It Take to Kill a Man?
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May 19th - Drinking Real THICC Water... How Bad Does It Taste?
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May 20th - We Played Strip Poker
(note- Mark lost so badly. Ethan also cheated on the first game)
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May 21st - Harnessing Our Yodeling Power to End the World aAs We Know It
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May 22nd - Mark Cooks Blindfolded While Ethan Guides Him Through FaceTime
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May 23rd - We Played the Newlywed Game While Consuimg That Which Will Kill the Other
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May 24th - DIY Boob
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May 25th - We Have the Best Bellies on Youtube
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May 26th - The Unus Annus Confessional Booth
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May 27th - DO NOT OPEN UNTIL 2080
(note- Mark will be 90 and Ethan will be 83)
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May 28th - Only UNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Unus vs Annus. Most Likes to Win.)
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May 28th - Only ANNUS-es May Watch This Video
(note- Annus vs Unus. Most Likes to Win.)
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May 29th - Only Watch from 2:15 to 6:11 --- DO NOT WATCH ANY OTHER PART OF THE VIDEO
(note- Annus Won)
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May 30th - DIY Wine
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May 31st - Tearing a Phone Book in Half with Our Huge Manly Muscles
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June 1st - 2 Complete Amateurs Enter a Body Building Competition
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June 2nd - BLACK LIVES MATTER. Resources and How You Can Help in the Description.
(note- This video was 8 Minutes and 47 seconds of silence)
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June 3rd - Crushing Watermelons Betwixt Our Mighty Thighs
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June 4th - Morphing Our Bodies Into Superhero Poses
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June 5th - Reacting to Your Hilarious Green Screen Memes
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June 6th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Read with Hooked on Phonics
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June 7th - Ethan Roasts Mark of 15 Minutes Straight
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June 8th - There's Something Horribly Wrong with This Picture...
(note- When they made their own creepy photos)
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June 9th - Attempting to Build IKEA Furniture Without Instructions
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June 10th - Mark and Ethan Become United State Citizens
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June 11th - We Made Fanart for Each Other
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June 12th - Our Fans Try and Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta
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June 13th - Recreating Childhood Photos
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June 14th - Will We Break the Boards... Or Will They Break Us?
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June 15th - Finding the Most Cursed Image on the Internet
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June 16th - Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our YouTube Views
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June 17th - Pee Sauna
(note- The end of quarintine videos. Second of the Pee Trilogy)
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June 18th - Building IKEA's Hardest Piece of Furniture Without Instruction is Impossible
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June 19th - Becoming One With the Horse
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June 20th - The Ultimate Paper Airplane Showdown
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June 21st - Creating Mark FISHbach
(note- Origin of Mermer
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June 22nd - Leaning How to Lock Pick (FBI Please Don't Watch)
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June 23rd - The Most Dangerous Shave
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June 24th - Ethan Traps Mark's Soul in the Palm of his Hand
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June 25th - Bear Trapping 101: An Elegant Knot For An Elegant Beast
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June 26th - 2 Men In a Trench Coat Teach You How to Save Money at the Movies
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June 27th - Building the World's First IKEA Boat
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June 28th - Ethan Teaches Mark How to Swim
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June 29th - 10 Miracle Products to Give YOU the Thiccest Jaw on Planet Earth
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June 30th - 2 Dirty Boys Wash Their Filthy Mouths Out with Soap
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July 1st - Mark is Guilty. Ethan Has the Proof.
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July 2nd - Recreating Mark's Childhood
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July 3rd - We Put an Apple Watch in a Rock Tumbler
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July 4th - Dummy Thicc for Dummies | A Tale of 2 Butts | Pushing Our Butts Even Further Beyond
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July 5th - Reverse Engineering a Kite to Steal the Idea of Electricity From Benjamin Franklin
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July 6th - The Candy Bra Challenge
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July 7th - Mark and Ethan Look at a Puppy for 10 Minutes
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July 8th - Unus Annus Try Pole Dancing
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July 9th - This Is Hiding On Your Body RIGHT NOW.
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July 10th - Tasting Weird Food Combos: Pickles and Chocolate? Ice Cream and Soy Sauce?
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July 11th - The Unus Annus Space Program
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July 12th - The Egg Smashing Game
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July 13th - Can You Bake a Cookie from Cookie Dough Ice Cream?
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July 14th - Bleachus Annus
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July 15th - Dunking Oreos In Literally Anything But Milk
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July 16th - Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs
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July 17th - DIY Teeth
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July 18th - How to Escape from a Hostage Situation
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July 19th - Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?
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July 20th - DIY Bed of Nails : OH GOD, PLEASE DON'T EVER TRY THIS
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July 21st - The Human Mop
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July 22nd - Can Sound Therapy Heal All Wounds?
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July 23rd - This Is The Most Dangerous Children's Toy Ever Made
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July 24th - Would Chica Save Us From Drowning?
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July 25th - We Do It Better Than Icarus Ever Could
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July 26th - The Beginning of The End
(note- 110 days left. Start of the Desert videos)
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July 27th - The Annual Unus Annus Dunk Contest
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July 28th - Ultimate Horseshoes
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July 29th - A Serious Conversation Under the Stars
(note- Last of the Desert videos)
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July 30th - Recharging Our Phones Using Only Brute Strength
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July 31st - 5 Products to Grow Your Patchy Beard
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August 1st - Mark Teaches Ethan How to Play the Trumpet
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August 2nd - Playing Cards: The World's Deadliest Weapon
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August 3rd - We Lubed Our Floor For a Sliding Competition
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August 4th - Breaking Glass With Our Screams
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August 5th - This is Goodbye
(note- 100 Days Left)
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August 6th - Mark and Ethan Share a Drink
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August 7th - The Wubble
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August 8th - Mark and Ethan Shave Chica
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August 9th - DO NOT TRY THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES
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August 10th - Judging Your Terrible Unus Annus Ideas
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August 11th - Hydro Dipping a Baby
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August 12th - Popping Popcorn with a High-Powered Laser
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August 13th - Puberty Simulator
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August 14th - Grip Strength Test: Loser Becomes the Winner's Butler for a Day
(note- Ethan "won" but Mark never became his Butler)
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August 15th - Transforming Mark into the 8th Wonder of the World
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August 16th - Momiplier Teaches Self-Defense
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August 17th - Playing Children's Games in Total Darkness
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August 18th - We're Better Than Dogs
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August 19th - The Koala Challenge: TikTok's Intimate Couple's Trend
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August 20th - 1 Gallon of Jello Nearly Broke Us
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August 21st - Too Many Pickles
(note- The Video before the start of Camp Unus Annus)
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August 22nd - Pitching a Tent in the Woods But There's a Bear 15 Feet Away
(note- Start of Camp Unus Annus. Mark was Blind while Ethan was Deaf)
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August 23rd - How to Rescue a Cat from a Tree
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August 24th - A Bear Attacked Us in the Middle of the Night
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August 25th - How to Safely Bury Your Friend
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August 26th - Team Building for 2: Trust Fall, Tug-of-War, and More!
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August 27th - How to Start a Fire (except don't...)
(note- The infamous video where Unus appears at the window before Mark kills Ethan)
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August 28th - Mark's Outdoor Escape Room
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August 29th - Hunting HeeHoo
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August 30th - Was 2020 a Bad Year for Unus Annus?
(note- End of Camp Unus Annus)
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August 31st - Mark Gives Ethan a HOT (stone) Massage
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September 1st - We Smell Every Smell
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September 2nd - How Many Slaps Does It Take to Cook a Chicken?
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September 3rd - 2 Boys 2 Poops
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September 4th - Mark Teaches Ethan How to March in a Marching Band
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September 5th - We Finally Drank Our DIY Wine
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September 6th - 2 Adults Take a 4th Grade Math Test
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September 7th - Making Snow Cones With Literally Anything but Normal Flavors
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September 8th - We Attempts Pottery Without Amy's Help
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September 9th - Can Plants Feel Pain?
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September 10th - How Far Can We Chuck a 16lbs Rock?
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September 11th - We Pierced Each Other's Ears
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September 12th - We Ate Dog Treats So You Don't Have To
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September 13th - We Accidentally Made an SCP While Amy Was Away
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September 14th - BEYBLADE NUTBALL
(note- The Finale of the Nutball Trilogy)
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September 15th - Making the Ultimate Unus Annus Burger
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September 16th - Making Soda With Literally Anything But Soda
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September 17th - Pee Soda
(note- The Finale of the Pee Trilogy)
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September 18th - Learning to Use The Force
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September 19th - Brick Soccer
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September 20th - We Attempt to Make Holy Water
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September 21st - Amy Sent Us a Mystery Box
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September 22nd - Mark Knows What Ethan Did...
(note- Ethan cheated on the Grip Test Video)
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September 23rd - This Video Will Never Make Sense
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September 24th - We Attempt to Make UNHOLY Water
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September 25h - We Will Churn Thy Butter
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September 26th - Ethan Teaches Mark Gymnastics
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September 27th - The Great Ice Cream Cake Race
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September 28th - Mark Teaches Ethan to Wrestle
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September 29th - Ethan Watches as Mark Achieves the Impossible
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September 30th - Consuming the World's Hottest Chip
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October 1st - This Video Went Completely Out of Control
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October 2nd - The 1000 High Five Challenge
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October 3rd - Bobbing For Apples But the Water Keeps Getting Thiccer
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October 4th - Mark Breaks His Nose On An Aerial Hoop
(note- Was the second time in one week)
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October 5th - Mark and Ethan Milk a Goat
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October 6th - Shooting Archery ON A HORSE
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October 7th - DIY Minesweeper
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October 8th - Literally Finding a needle in a Haystack
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October 9th - Drawing on Each Other's Backs in Total Darkness
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October 10th - This is For FUN and NOT a Fetish
(note- They were in black bags with a vacuum to such out the air)
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October 11th - Mark Conquers His Fear of Night Swimming
(note- Birth of the Gongoozler)
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October 12th - The Painful Wolrd of Aerial Silks
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October 13th - We Bought Every Grinch Costume on Ebay
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October 14th - Pumpkin Taste Tier List
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October 15th - Learn to Jump Higher in 16 Minutes and 16 Seconds
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October 16th - Bobbing for Literally Anything but Apples
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October 17th - This Video is Completely Unedited
(note- This is the video where they shoved Wax up their nose and Marks got stuck)
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October 18th - Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea
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October 19th - Pumpkin Spice "Challenge"
(note- Similar to the Cinnamon Challenge excpet with Pumpkin Spice and don't do this please)
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October 20th - Mark and Ethan Build a Scarecrow
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October 21st - Preassure Waching Our Sins Away
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October 22nd - We Force Mark to Swin in the Ocean (HIS GREATEST FEAR)
(note- First of the Two Boat videos)
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October 23rd - Fighting Fish to the Deathin in the Deep Blue Sea
(note- Second of the Two Boat Videos
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October 24th - Cryptid Olympics
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October 25th - Phasmophobia in Real Life
(note- Ghost hunt time)
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October 26th - Edward Pumpkin Hands
(note- First Video in big spooky house)
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October 27th - Blood Bath
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October 28th - The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest
(note- Second Video in big spooky house)
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October 29th - Ethan Turns Mark into a Werewolf
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October 30th - Ethan Kidnapped Mark
(note- Third Video in big spooky house. Ethan made Mark an escape room)
​
October 31st - The Truth of Unus Annus
(note- Final Video in the big house. They open the Custom Coffin and change from their clothes into their suits. 13 Days Left)
​
November 1st - Accepting the Truth
(note- They Accept they are going to die. They remain in their suits from this point onward)
​
November 2nd - The Unus Annus Last Supper
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November 3rd - Being Brutally Honest with Each Other
(note- Mark cries)
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November 4th - Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video
(note- 45 minutes and 11 seconds. Longest video)
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November 5th - All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened
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November 6th - Who's Cutting Onions In Here???
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November 7th - The 1st Annual Unus Annus Roast
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November 8th - God's Fitness Test
​
November 9th - Saying Goodbye to All Our Guests
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November 10th - Everything's Legal If You're Dead
(note- Cooking with Sex Toys 2)
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November 11th - 7 Minutes in Heaven | 7 Minutes in Hell
(note- Ethan got heaven, Mark got hell)
​
November 12th - The Unus Annus Annual Sleepover
(note- The final video.)
​
November 13th - Goodbye.
(note- The final livestream.)

Ernie Accorsi is a wreck during games. The long-time football executive, best known for his tenure as general manager of the New York Giants from 1998 to 2007, can barely stand to watch the action on Sundays. “You’re helpless up there,” he says of watching games from the press box. “You’re totally helpless.”
Typically, during his most nervous moments, Accorsi would head down to the ground level of a stadium and walk the corridors, periodically peering in through the tunnels to check what was happening on the field — determining the rest by crowd noise.
Twenty years ago, Accorsi had the most relaxing fourth quarter of his life as an executive. During the NFC Championship Game at Giants Stadium, he ditched the sterile press box, headed down to field level and, instead of pacing, stood proudly in the tunnel taking in the scene. The Giants, underdogs that day, were leading the visiting Vikings, 41-0.
“Standing there in the tunnel, just feeling the electricity in the crowd because they knew it, they were chanting ‘Super Bowl,’” Accorsi remembers, “that was one of the great feelings I’ve ever had in my life.”
Entering the 2000 season, the Giants were nobody’s idea of an NFC contender. They had missed the playoffs the previous two seasons and five of the previous six. They hadn’t won a playoff game since Phil Simms and Lawrence Taylor wore blue, and head coach Jim Fassel was coaching for his job in his fourth season.
That tension reached its zenith the week of Thanksgiving. A promising start had crashed in back-to-back home blowout losses, first to the frontrunning Rams and then to the mediocre Lions. The morning before Thanksgiving, New York was 7-4, in third in the NFC East, and thanks to tiebreakers on the outside of the NFC playoff picture.
John Fox, defensive coordinator: The team was pretty low after that game with Detroit … I can remember at the team prayer after that game thinking, “God, we’re not very good.”
Fassel: Every team has ups and downs. It’s the way you handle it as a coach. You’ve got to have a, I don’t know, a belief to each other about what we’re going to do. I believed in those guys. I believed that we had that. I told the coaches that we’re going to remain positive.
In his Wednesday gathering with the media, Fassel expressed that belief memorably.
“If you’ve got the laser, put it right on my chest, I’ll take full responsibility. I’m raising the stakes right now,” he said. “If this is a poker game, I’m shoving my chips to the middle of the table. I’m raising the ante. Anybody who wants in can get in, anybody who wants out can get out: This team is going to the playoffs.”
The New York Times called it “a passionate, unsolicited and wholly uncharacteristic speech” from “the Mister Rogers of football.”
Bob Papa, radio broadcaster: Everybody viewed it as a little shocking, which gave it more credence. That’s something that (Bill) Parcells would do, or a coach with a different disposition would do. It was out of character for Fassel, and that helped it carry more weight and resonate with everybody inside the building.
Fassel: It’s our job (as coaches) to make the adjustments. That’s our job. So I put it on the coaches, and the players knew that I put it on the coaches. And I included myself, you know?
Accorsi: He put himself on the line. In a situation like we were in, I never worried about if somebody stirs something up. If everything’s going smoothly and we’re 9-1, don’t disturb the waters. But in that kind of situation, throw caution to the wind. I’m not saying that was the reason, but it turned out that it helped us because it got us stimulated. It caught everybody’s interest.
Fox: Our team did respond. It was like, “OK, our leader has said he’s all-in, so we better be all-in.”
Keith Hamilton, defensive tackle: He didn’t mess around. Him coming out saying that meant a lot to the team, it uplifted everybody. I remember practice was upbeat, and we took care of business.
Papa: I thought it was a stroke of genius by Fassel to do it as they were getting ready to play the Cardinals, who weren’t a very good team. It was the perfect game to give the team confidence. He pressed the exact right button at the right time.
The Giants beat backup quarterback Dave Brown in Arizona, 31-7, that weekend, then upset Washington on the road 9-7 the following week when Eddie Murray missed a late field goal.
Accorsi: If Murray makes that kick, I don’t think we make the playoffs.
The Giants stretched their winning streak to five to close out the season with victories over the Steelers, Cowboys and Jaguars. Thanks to second-half swoons by St. Louis and Minnesota, the Week 17 win over Jacksonville clinched home-field advantage for New York. The Giants dispatched the division-rival Eagles for a third time that season in the Divisional Playoff, setting up an NFC Championship Game against the Vikings. Although the road team, Minnesota was favored by two points.
“(The Giants) surprised me, I think they’ve surprised everybody,” John Madden said pregame on the Fox broadcast. “The keyword is they’ve done it as a team … Today they’ve got to do more than that.”
Jessie Armstead, linebacker: Going into that game, they were saying nobody could stop that offense.
The Vikings had a 1,500-yard rusher in Robert Smith, two 1,000-yard receivers in Randy Moss and Cris Carter and a Pro Bowl quarterback in Daunte Culpepper.
Fassel: I thought we could beat them. I thought it was going to be a close game.
Accorsi: If you look at that offensive lineup, I kidded John Fox: “The Vikings score 400 touchdowns between midnight and 8 in the morning when I try to sleep.” Fox turned to me and said, “We might shut them out.”
Fox: We matched up pretty good. Our defensive front was very good, so I thought we could handle the run game pretty well. They had two big wideouts, we had two big corners.
They had a little bit of a tendency where when they were in shotgun it would be a pass and when the quarterback was under it was run. So we had a couple of automatics in the game based on that backfield set that would permit us to play an extra guy in the box. That was pretty advantageous to us as well.
Fassel: I really thought in my head, these guys think they’re coming in here to kick our ass, and that ain’t gonna happen. I did stuff to jab our team. I wanted to make sure my team understood this is the highest scoring team in the league and everybody’s betting on them. To use that kind of thing. They’re betting on them, they’re gonna kick our ass. And had fun with it.
Hamilton: We knew they couldn’t beat us. The coaching staff knew they could not beat us. We were confident.
That confidence existed on the other side of the ball, as well. While the media posited that a characteristically cold and windy day at Giants Stadium would behoove the home team, offensive coordinator Sean Payton was praying for better weather. When he saw a mild forecast, he confidently told his offense it could hang a hundred on Minnesota’s defense. He dubbed it “Air Force week,” building a game plan around quarterback Kerry Collins’ arm rather than the team’s traditional running game.
📷Amani Toomer finished the game with six catches for 88 yards and a touchdown. (Stan Honda / AFP via Getty Images)
Papa: He thought the Giants could pass all over the Vikings. We started to get a sense they were licking their chops. Talking to the players, they couldn’t wait.
Fassel: I could see it; I knew we were good the way we warmed up, the way we talked. And it was good we could play at our place.
Giants Stadium was packed with fans waving white towels well before the 12:30 p.m. kickoff, riled up by honorary captains Lawrence Taylor, Harry Carson and Ottis Anderson — who spent the rest of the day on the sidelines with the team.
Accorsi: It was electric in there. It really was.
Fox: A lot of people don’t realize that’s way more electric than the Super Bowl. It doesn’t have the meaning of the Super Bowl, but as far as the stadium atmosphere with real fans, it’s pretty wild.
Armstead: You had all the legends. You realize you weren’t just playing for yourself. When you go to the sidelines, those guys were out on the field and you had to perform.
Hamilton: Looking at Lawrence Taylor and looking at Harry Carson, you can’t even make that up. They’re on the sidelines; that’s a dream come true. That’s everything. I don’t know how to put that into words.
It was the offense that set the tone, though. Winning the toss and electing to receive, the Giants marched 74 yards on four plays, culminating in Collins’ 46-yard vertical seam touchdown strike to Ike Hilliard. The Vikings fumbled the ensuing kickoff, New York defensive back Lyle West recovered, and Collins hit fullback Greg Comella on a wheel route for another touchdown on the next play. In 143 seconds, the Giants were up 14-0.
Hamilton: That gave us a jolt. We weren’t used to the offense doing too much.
Armstead: Our thing was, if our offense scores 17 points, we’ll win the football game.
Papa: Everything they talked about during the week was starting to unfold. But you were still incredulous because you kept waiting for the Vikings to get their mojo going, and it never happened.
Fox: It was 14-0 and I’m not sure anybody had broken a sweat yet.
“I don’t think in their wildest dreams could they have dreamt this,” said Madden on the broadcast.
The onslaught did not stop there. The Giants hounded Culpepper into quick throws and frustrated Moss and Carter with physical coverage. And the “Air Force” approach continued on offense, as Collins meticulously picked apart the Minnesota defense in a first half for the ages.
He hit Joe Jurevicius in the back of the end zone to make it 24-0 early in the second quarter. “This is unbelievable!” said Madden. Pat Summerall added, “I thought the Giants had a chance, but wow!”
📷Joe Jurevicius had just two catches for 15 yards but one went for a touchdown. (Ezra O. Shaw / Allsport)
With the seconds ticking down in the first half, Collins found Hilliard for a second time in the end zone for a 34-0 lead.
Collins finished the half 23-of-34 for 338 yards and four touchdowns — already a franchise record for passing yards in a playoff game (and 101 more yards, incidentally, than Collins combined for in New York’s two other playoff games that season). On Fox, Terry Bradshaw called it “the most impressive half of football by a quarterback and an offense I’ve ever seen.”
It was a validating performance for Collins — and for the team that signed him at his low point. He had been the fifth overall pick in the 1995 draft by Carolina, leading the Panthers to the NFC Championship Game in his second season. But by the time he was a free agent, he’d been waived by Carolina, had played poorly in a cameo with New Orleans, had battled alcoholism and been accused of racism.
Fassel got emotional talking about Collins’ performance that day.
Fassel: It was fabulous. I’ll tell you this: Some of this stuff coming back to me really means a lot. Kerry was out. People cut him, we picked him up, and nobody really thought Kerry Collins was going to be a great quarterback. He was just amazing. He came in and he was a leader. He played so confidently, like “This is my game, guys, I’ve got them.” And that carried to the whole team.
The 34-point halftime lead remains the largest in the history of the NFC Championship Game.
Hamilton: That was amazing. I couldn’t have been prouder of the preparation that went into the game, the things (the offense) did, and they excelled. They just took off.
Fox: Payton had said (before the game), “How many you gonna need?” I told him 31. Well it was 34-0 and we were running in and he said, “Is that enough?” I said, “Hell no!”
Fassel: I told Fox (at halftime), “If they score 35 points, you’re fired!”
Armstead: Nobody’s going to come back on our defense at 34-0. That’s impossible. There was no way with the guys we had on that defense that we’d tolerate 14 points, nevertheless 34.
Culpepper fumbled on the first play of the second half, with Collins throwing a fifth TD pass moments later, this time to Amani Toomer. “The Viking defense looks like it’s chairs,” said Madden. Later, he added, “The Giants have broken the Minnesota Vikings’ will.”
Hamilton: There’s no question. You’ve been fighting a man all day for a couple hours, the look in their eyes is a different look. Ain’t no colorful words for it. They know when it’s time to go home.
📷The Giants sacked Culpepper four times and intercepted him three times. (Ezra Shaw / Allsport)
Collins was replaced by backup Jason Garrett with 12:53 remaining in the fourth quarter; the Giants proceeded on a 19-play drive to run out the clock. It’s tied for the seventh-largest margin of victory in an NFL playoff game in the Super Bowl era. An underdog has never won by more.
Armstead: We were mad at Coach Fassel. We were like, “Hey, let’s get 50!”
Fassel: I don’t think I’ve ever been in a game like that … We just annihilated them. It wasn’t luck, it wasn’t like at the last minute. We just kicked their butt right from the beginning.
Armstead: You know how hard it is to win a ballgame in the National Football League, to be in the playoffs against a team that was predicted to be in the Super Bowl — to beat them 41-0 was the most amazing thing about it.
Papa: I’ll say to this day, it’s the greatest win and the greatest performance by a Giants team in the history of that stadium.
Fox: Watching them construct that stage at the end of the game, I can remember looking at my three sons saying, “We’re going to the freakin’ Super Bowl!” Everybody in the league — whether you’re a coach, scout, an administrator, an owner, a player — that’s your goal: to go to the Super Bowl.
Hamilton: Just to be a part of that, in that atmosphere, the fans were happy because they came to the game to watch a winner. I was happier for them than for me.
Armstead: We were on a real high. I wish we could have played that following week against Baltimore.
The high, of course, didn’t last. Two weeks later in the Super Bowl, Collins was intercepted four times and the Giants didn’t score an offensive point against the record-setting Ravens defense. They lost Super Bowl XXXV, 34-7.
Accorsi: As a franchise that has won four Super Bowls, that’s why that team doesn’t have a great legacy.
But for one day, they were as good as the Giants had ever been.
Fassel: One thing, as a coach, when the guys go out and play so good, you do have to think to yourself: I guess I handled them pretty good this week.

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An ocean of red surrounded him, stretching as far as the eye could see. The landscape was featureless, just a constant crimson that engulfed even the horizon. Picking up a foot he took a step forward, then he felt it, the feeling of something breaking beneath his feet. It reverberated through his leg, the ripples from the disturbed crimson surface spread outwards from him as the feeling spread inwards. He gritted his teeth, the feeling wouldn't relent, the ocean was draining away, a sense of dread filled him, he didn't want to see, he didn't want to know what he stepped on, but it just kept draining. He would see it soon, he would know, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't want to, he didn't...
David woke with a start, he was breathing heavily and shaking uncontrollably in a cold sweat. He took a few deep breaths and rubbed his face to wake himself. Just a dream. He brought his breathing back down to normal and looked at the clock on the wall, It was early morning. David sighed and laid his head back down, he would doze a bit till it was a more appropriate time to wake. At least he tried to, he couldn't seem to get even a nap in. Cursing it all he just grabbed the controls for the entertainment system to find something to preoccupy himself.
He swapped through a series of shows over the next couple of hours. He watched recent news for a bit, then a couple of different nature documentaries on various planets, and then a brutal version of football where the players were all remotely piloting heavy robots they could slam around with impunity. Eventually the hospital came to life again and the Vildune doctor entered into his room.
It gave him a quizzical look before speaking. "Oh, you're awake, didn't expect you to be up this early."
David gave a smile in return. "Yeah I guess I'm just an early riser." He turned the entertainment system off so he could properly listen.
"Well since you are up, we could start your final examination so we can get you cleared to leave."
David perked up a bit. "Sounds like a plan to me." The doctor started testing his body, poking, prodding and recording his reflexes. He shined a light in his eyes and questioned it's reflective properties, to which David gave a summarized explanation. The doctor was intrigued but didn't push him for more details, instead continuing with the examination. He finished by having him stand and conducting a basic mobility test. David went through a range of motions and stretches to make sure everything was working as intended.
Content with the tests the doctor had David sit. "Looking good, everything seems to be in order. Do you feel that something's off or otherwise not operating as it should?"
David just shook his head. "No everything feels fine."
The doctor nodded. "Alright, once I submit this form you'll be cleared to leave, if you could just sign here, thank you, any questions?"
Something popped into his head that he had forgotten. "Actually yeah, where did my stuff go?"
"You mean your pants? We were keeping it stored for you after we had it cleaned."
"Was there a blue scale in one of the pockets, do you still have that?" David was getting concerned.
"Yes I believe there was, we stored it with the pants if that's what you are wondering about."
David let out a relieved sigh. "Thanks, I would like that returned to me please."
The doctor nodded. "Of course, a nurse will bring your effects as well as a new printed shirt and pair of shoes."
"Appreciate it doc, thanks again." The doctor gave him a smile then left to file the paperwork. David sat down on the bed again to wait for everything to be processed. It was maybe ten minutes before a nurse showed up to deliver his clothes. The pile was deposited on the bedside with a polite nod, then they left.
David noticed the scale on top and picked it up to examine it again, It still had its luster but the edges were scuffed and scratched now, a testament to its use in his escape. He smiled to himself, I should make this into a necklace or something. He set it aside while he stripped down and got his clothes on. After he was properly dressed he slipped the scale into one pocket and the credit chip into his other before exiting his room.
Stepping into the hall he inhaled deeply, enjoying the freedom that he had missed. A call from down the hallway got his attention as he turned to see Sky and Solomon sitting in some chairs, evidently waiting for him. He smiled and approached to pair who stood to greet him. "Morning Sky, Solomon, were you guys waiting for me?"
"Not for very long." Solomon responded. "We decided it would be appropriate to congratulate you on your release from the hospital."
David chuckled a bit. "Thanks, but it was just one night, no need to stand on ceremony."
Solomon did a 'shrug'. "Well it was that, and Sky here doesn't seem to want to let you out of his sight." Sky snapped to Solomon with a look of betrayal before looking at the ground embarrassed.
David laughed and ruffled his head feathers a bit. Sky actually flinched a little at that, and a needle of sadness pierced David's heart. "Don't worry Sky I'm not going anywhere fast. I got to contact my boss and let them know the situation, then I have to get a new ship, supplies, equipment and a general sense of what I'm going to do next." Sky just nodded and continued staring at the floor. "Well, I'm going to go send a message, so you guys can wait for me at the front if you want."
With a nod they left to wait and David went off at a brisk pace to the public terminals. Following the signs on the walls he found them fairly quickly and signed in to his account. Labeling the message as an emergency situation update, he summarized the events of what transpired to the best of his abilities.
Before he hit send, he hesitated as he thought about something. His boss technically did belong to a branch of the government so maybe they could pull some strings for him. He added a p.s. to his letter asking for a favor and sent off the message. With that done he signed out of everything and left to meet up with Sky and Solomon.
He found them waiting in the lobby and with a wave joined up with them. "Sorry to keep you waiting. So, what's the plan for today then?"
Solomon responded. "I was going to research where I may be needed as a doctor or if there was a hospital that could use my services."
"Well wherever you go they will be lucky to have you. I think I'm going to get a new ship first, if you find out where you want to go, I can give you a lift so you don't have to hire a shuttle."
Solomon raised a manipulator at him. "I don't want to impose on you more than I have already."
David scoffed. "Impose? Come on, you're not imposing. We can just take a jump gate and be anywhere with another orbital station, and even if there wasn't a jump gate it would still be no big deal. Just accept the offer already, you might hurt my feelings if you don't." David got him with that one, his manipulators slumped a bit as he was caught between a rock and a hard place, and he knew it.
"Twist my tentacles why don't you. Fine, I will graciously accept your offer."
David smiled a devious little smile at his success. "Excellent, lets meet up later tonight to talk about things. If I remember correctly, I think there is a bar on level 23 called Zarg's bar 'n grill, sounds plain but they fix up a damn good drink. Lets meet around seven, standard Terran time, tonight for a bit of celebration and planning."
"Sounds good. I take it you are going to stay with David, Sky?" Sky was still embarrassed and just nodded. "Well then, I will see you both later." With that he turned and left leaving the two of them alone.
David turned to Sky who looked at him finally. "Well we should get going and find a new ship." Sky nodded and followed slightly behind him as they walked. They found an unoccupied lift and David set in a command to take them to the market level. Sky was being quiet the whole time and David felt kind of awkward with the little guy just standing there like some kind of attendant.
David decided he should try and start a conversation. "So how are you doing?"
Sky looked up at him quizzically. "What do you mean?"
"I mean with everything that's happened. You doing alright?"
Sky looked back down apparently thinking about it. "I'm not sure, I guess I'm a little nervous. I've never been anywhere but the Dread Throne before, I have no idea what to expect or do."
David bobbed his head a few times. "I see, well don't worry, I think you'll like freedom more than you know." A soft chime sounded in the lift and the door opened to reveal the market, bustling with life as people went to and from different shops and stalls talking to the various vendors selling goods from their planets. The diversity of life in the crowd was always exhilarating. Many different species walking, sliding, crawling, and flying all over the place while talking to the vendors, haggling and buying what they wanted, was energizing to say the least.
David was about to step out of the lift when he felt a hand grab onto his pocket. David looked down to see Sky, wide eyed, staring at the crowd of people like a deer in headlights before blinking a few times and noticing what he did. His hand quickly shot back down to his side and he mumbled a quick "I'm sorry."
David gave him a soft smile. "It's ok, just stay close and you'll be fine." Sky nodded and they exited together. David started weaving through the crowd Sky kept close to his side as he did. David found Sky's reaction to be quite funny as he stared at everything, mouth slightly agape like a little kid. Sky's gaze lingered on a vendor who was selling some hefty looking alien fruits, and David thought he might have saw Sky gulp a little bit at the sight of them.
Why not. David weaved his way over to the vendor with Sky in tow. Stopping in front of the stall the vendor gave him a warm welcome and insisted they buy his merchandise. David, not one to disappoint, scanned over the fruits for a moment before he saw one with good size and color to it. Selecting it from the pile, the merchant presented a device to pay with and David inserted his new chip into it, then scanned his hand. A second later a green light came on and the vendor gave him a polite bow in thanks for the patronage.
David turned back to Sky and presented the fruit to him. His eyes went wide as he stared at it, mouth hanging open, and David thought he might start drooling. He reached for it but stopped part way, hesitating. He looked up and David and asked "Can I?" Icy cold needles of sadness were everywhere in his heart now.
David managed to keep smiling and replied. "Yes, go ahead." Sky grabbed hold of the fruit with both hands and looked upon it like it was the most valuable thing in the world. He opened up and sunk his beak into the fruits flesh, slicing into it with an ease born of his natural affinity towards it's consumption. A look that could only be described as ecstasy flooded across his features as he practically melted on the spot, savoring every ounce of flavor.
David just smiled at his friends, but the sadness ate at his insides. This was probably the first real fruit Sky had eaten since he was a little kid. Anger at the snake bitch rose from the grave, but with nowhere to go, it evaporated into the ether. "Can you eat and walk Sky?" Sky snapped out of his own personal rapture and took a moment to process the question before giving him a quick nod. David smiled and started walking again, making sure he kept an eye on Sky as he ate his fruit so he didn't wander off.
He found a directory at a junction and looked over it for the shipyard. Target located he headed in that direction and into an interior lift which he keyed the correct sub level to go to. Sky had managed to finish an impressive amount of the fruit by the time they stepped out.
The entire level was dedicated to the creation and selling of ships of all shapes and sizes. The reception lobby was all clean polished metal with a large desk manned by three individuals of various species. David walked up to the desk with Sky behind him taking in the sights as he munched on his food.
A polite greeting was had and they asked how they could be of service. "Yes, I'm in the market for a high end exploration ship, powerful scanners, good for long journeys, and preferably a method of self defense." No way was he gonna be caught with his pants literally down again.
The individual talking to him gave him a once over before replying. "Such a ship would be quite expensive sir."
David felt a twinge of irritation, he knew he didn't look great in his plain white shirt and worn pants, but he adopted a smug grin. Pulling over the credit scanner he inserted his chip into it. "Is this enough?"
David watched with immense satisfaction as their eyes widened in surprise and they tripped over themselves trying to apologize. "M...my apologize sir, please follow me we will get you a custom ship to your exact desires." They proceeded to lead the pair down a hallway and into a private room.
The doors money opens, David mused. He sat in a really nice leather chair, Sky just finished the last of his fruit as he sat next to him. The receptionist excused themselves to retrieve a representative that could help them. They waited in the room for a few minutes before the door opened again revealing a four armed biped, Quallexen David believed the name was, fifth seat of the alliance. The light green skin on its body was indicative of the foliage of its planet, it had skin that looked like a lizards, its slender form was incredibly flexible putting even the best of earth contortionists to shame.
It entered and raised an eyebrow at the two of them for a quick moment before adopting its practiced business face. "Hello, my names Cathol, I heard you would like to order a custom ship?"
David nodded. "Indeed, I'd like to see all your options if you wouldn't mind." Cathol walked over and handed them a data-pad prompting a holo-display to appear in the middle of the room, and then sat across from them. David examined the information on the pad, a complete list of ship types, features, and cosmetic preferences. David looked across at the dealer who was apparently not expecting much from the pair. David fought to keep the smug look under control and began to make his selections.
Selecting the newest line of Venture series ships he sifted through the options and saw an impressive list of function and comfort items. He began selecting some of the options such as, nice pilot seats, lounge, gym, fabricator, and fully stocked kitchen. This got another raised eyebrow from Cathol but David wasn't done yet. Moving on to the functional features he specified complete control of the ship from the cockpit, Biometric scanners, Reinforced doors, localized environmental controls for each room, customized suites with one set to the preferences of Aoulooron's and the others defaulted to human preferences, shields as heavy as were allowed on a civilian vessel and equally heavy armament, then finished it off with a few cosmetic changes.
Cathol was now quite surprised by all the selections, but to their credit they did a fairly good job at hiding it. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Well sir, if you are done with your selections I can give you a quote." He used a data-pad of his own and input a few things, then a number appeared that was quite large. David had the money most definitely but his mother would strangle him if he didn't at least try and haggle it down.
"Seriously? I know its custom but I could probably get this same ship at a discount at Atlas station."
Cathol's brow furrowed a bit "Sir I assure you this is an accurate estimate of the price."
Tough cookie huh. "Alright Sky come on, we'll try at the next station." Sky looked slightly confused at what was going on but got up anyway and followed him towards the door.
"Sir, please wait, I can maybe adjust the price a bit for you." He tapped on his pad again and the number was shaved down a little bit.
David walked back into the room a little bit but didn't sit down. "You have my interest, but not my business yet."
"Sir you must be reasonable, this is a tall order to fill."
"I'm not asking for much Cathol, just a price that we can both be happy with at the end of the day." Cathol stared at him for a moment but David was putting on his best poker face. With a sigh Cathol tapped once again on the pad and the number dropped a little again. David gave a smile at the new price. "There we go, that is a more acceptable number." He sat back down in the chair. "Now how soon can I expect this to be done?"
"We have a ship in this model ready, we would just need to add all your preferred features. It should be done by tomorrow afternoon."
"Sounds good to me, where do I sign?" A image appeared on his pad, standard agreement for this kind of deal. He gave a quick once over of the forms and then signed his name at the bottom. Cathol now smiled and stood to offer him a hand, which David took.
"Pleasure doing business with you sir. Your order will arrive at hanger C on the 54^th floor after midday tomorrow."
"Thank you Cathol, I will expect it then." Cathol escorted the pair to the exit and saw them off with a polite bow as the lift door closed. David released the tension in his body with a sigh. Sky was looking at him with a questioning look.
"What just happened?" He finally asked.
David chuckled a bit. "It's called haggling Sky, some places let you negotiate on the price, and sometimes you have to be aggressive about it." Sky just thought on it for a second before shaking his head apparently giving up on the concept for the moment. David chuckled again but turned his mind towards stocking his new ship and getting equipment. Time for some shopping.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________
As usual let me know what you think down below and of anything that could improve my writing.

Unus Annus, Cooking with Sex Toys, Purging Our Sins with a Neti Pot, Hot Dog'd to Death, Making Our Own Sensory Deprivation Tank, The Good Kind of Cupping, The Bad Kind of Cupping, The Worst Kind of Cupping, Ethan Will Be Kicked in the Balls, Doing Each Other's Makeup in the Dark, Baby Hands Operation, Mark and Ethan Summon a Ghost, 2 Truths and 1 Lie -- Waxing Edition, Poopsie Sparkly Critters (a slime surprise...), Play-Doh Thanksgiving, Helium Therapy, Drawing Memes from Memory, 1 Man 100 Accents, An A.I. Predicts How We're Going to Die, Mark Turns Ethan into a Mummy to Prepare Him for the Great Beyond, The Chubby Gummy Challenge, We Buy a Professional Hypnosis Video and React To It, Mark and Ethan Attempt an Escape Room, Ethan Destroys Mark's Van with a Bat, There's Still Hope..., Ethan Gives Mark a Viking Funeral, The Great Meat Mistake, Acupuncture Is NOT Painful, Floating in a Real Sensory Deprivation Tank, Mark Reviews The Impossible Burger But There's a Looming Sense of Impending Doom, We Made Nude Paintings of Eachother, You Made Beautiful Music for The Barrel... But Only One Could Win, We Had To Drink Each Other's Pee, Ethan Explores Mark's Haunted Basement, Giving Away Our 1,000,000 Subscriber Gold Play Button, Ethan's Relaxing and Totally Normal Nail Salon, Taped and Afraid, What Was The Most Painful Thing We've Ever Endured?, Donating Toys to Charity w/ JackSepticEye, Harnessing Our Dogs' Unlimited Energy, Santa's Mukbang (Drinking 1 Gallon of Eggnog), Forcibly Turning Mark Into Santa Claus Against His Will, Preserving Ourselves In Wax, Beating Inanimate Objects to Death, Emotional Pain vs Physical Pain... Which is Worse?, Duct Tape Crucifixion (Amy, Please Don't Watch This Video), You Blink You Lose, 2 Grown Men Attempt the Presidential Fitness Test, We Took The Polar Plunge, Hiding Our Sins from Amy's Holy Peepers, We Eat Bugs, DIY Bungee Jump (please don't try this), We Have The BEST Thumbnails on YouTube and No One Can Tell Us Otherwise, Who Can Make Themselves Taller?, The Sensory Overload Tank, Recreating Ourselves as a Cursed Mannequin, We Took an IQ Test, Ethan Finally Becomes a MAN, Mark and Ethan Go Casket Shopping, We Take a Lie Detector Test to Uncover Our Darkest Sins, Learning to Breathe Underwater, Fixing Mark's Hole with Ramen but Every Time We Add Glue We Get 5% Closer to God, Mark Steals Ethan's Face, You Breathe You Die, 2 Absolute Beginners Experience the Dancing Glory that is Salsa, DIY Geriatric Simulator, This Is How We'll Die..., We Cryogenically Freeze Ourselves, This is What Being Tased Feels Like, What Happens When A Youtube Channel Dies?, Bad Bad Beans, We Hired a Real Hypnotherapist to Analyze Our Darkest Dreams, We Turned Our Bodies Into Art, Mark and Ethan Learn About The Human Body, Mark Punishes Ethan, Strange (and legal) Things You Can Do With Your Body After Death, DIY Cheese, Hacking The Very Fabric of the Universe, Looking at Long Lost Memes, Discovering the Secret to Eternal Life, Turning Mark Into an E-Boy, Ethan Redefines Male Beauty, Professional Fire Cupping (Going Even Further Beyond), An Extremely Sour, Not-at-all Sour Meal, Literally Eating Fire, Unregulated Axe Throwing, Literally Laying On Literal Broken Glass, Making an Indoor Tornado to Flex on Mother Nature, Nutball: The Most Dangerous Game, Becoming a Master of Mime, Discussing the Idea of Murdering Each Other but It's Just a Joke and Definitely Not Serious Haha, Are We Already Dead?, Our Perfect (and last) Valentine's Day, Drunk College Party Simulator, 10 Strange Amazon Products Ethan Bought Mark Because He Doesn't Know How to Spend Money Responsibly, Chickens Teach Us About Life and Death, 3 Big Boys Attempt the King's Royal Fitness Test, Being Attacked by a Fully Trained Bodyguard Dog, Learning the Ancient Art of Chinese Archery, The Ultimate Trolley Problem, Goat Yoga, Edible Slime was a Mistake., Granting Access Into Heaven's Sweet Gates, Long Hair, Do We Dare?, We Wrote a Hit Pop Song in 30 Minutes, Mark and Ethan Go on a "Drum Date", Blowing Our Souls Into Some Hot Glass, Top 10 Worst Things Your Friend Could Possibly Spend Their Money On, Nutball Extreme: Taser Edition, REAL Ghost Hunting at an Abandoned Zoo, We Bought a Camera That Can Look Inside Us, Becoming the World's Greatest DJs, Who Can Teach Their Dog a Trick the Fastest?, Middle School Science Experiment Teaches Us About Life and Death, DIY Chiropractor, Mark and Ethan Get Into a Fight, The Barrel, We Got Pepper Sprayed, We Give Each Other Tattoos Blindfolded, What Does Astrology Say About Our Friendship?, Mark and Ethan Get a Full Body Scan to See What Secrets Lay Hidden Within (and learn their body fat), Mark Needs To Rub Ethan and Only His Mom Can Help Him, 2 Idiots Get Crushed by 18-Foot Giant Snakes, Beer Sauna: Turning a Portable Sauna into a Portable Hell, Mark and Ethan Hunt The World's Most Wanted Criminals, Unus Annus Carves the Roast Beast, 5 Weird Apps That Predicted Our Death, We Tried a Labor Pain Simulator, Recreating the Miracle of Childbirth, Mark and Ethan Are Now Fathers, We Force James Charles to Run a Military Obstacle Course, Desperately Trying To Not Touch Our Faces, Reddit 50/50: Two Player Edition, Going on an Internet Scavenger Hunt, Having an Adventure In VR Chat Because We Can't Go Outside, Amazon Shopping for the Apocalypse, Whom Would Eat Whomst First in a Zombie Apocalypse?, Ultimate YouTuber Boxing Showdown, The Deep End of Omegle: Risky Boogaloo, Where in the World is Unus Annus?, Mark Builds a Pillow Fort for the Very First Time, Mark's 1 Weird Talent Leaves Ethan Absolutely Speechless, Wikifeet: A Tale of 2 Tootsies, We Made Every YouTuber Battle in the Hunger Games, We Google Each Other to Find Our Darkest Forgotten Sins, We Played Mad Libs And Ran It Through Google Translate, Mark and Ethan Desperately Try and Name a Single State in the USA, Speed Reading 1000+ WPM to Gain a Complete Understanding of All Human Knowledge, What is the Least Viewed Video on YouTube?, We Found Websites That The World Forgot About, The Scariest True Stories on the Internet, How to NOT be the Perfect Boyfriend, Mark and Ethan Find The Lost City of El Dorado, Mark and Ethan Bet Everything on a Wikipedia Race, The Creepiest Videos on Youtube, Help Us Break a YouTube World Record, 2 Men 200 Accents, The Illuminati... Do They Really Exist?, Finding The Lost City of Atlantis, Reading YOUR Scariest True Stories, Mark and Ethan Take a Personality Test, Will AI Soon Take Over Humanity As We Know It?, Running Internet Drama through Google Translate, The Secret Unus Annus No-Touchy-Touchy Hand Shake, Two Male Men Judge Female Women on Their Beauty, Bored? Press This Button., Don't Go in the Ocean... Ever., We Explore the Most MYSTERIOUS Mysteries of our Wildy Mysterious Mystery Moon of Mysteries, We Looked at Unus Annus Memes, Is Mark a Masochist?, What the Hell is a Pink Trombone?, Professional Fetish Scientists Rank the Best/Worst Fetishes of 2020, Mark and Ethan Desperately Attempt to Feel Something, An A.I. Generates Our Worst Nightmare, Are Reptilian Humanoids Living Among us?, Like It or Not... This is What The New Human Looks Like, Eating Only Onions for 24 Hours: How Many Onions Does it Take to Kill a Man?, Unus Annus ASMR, We Attempted to Create THICC Water, Making Our Own Gravestones to Prepare For Our Inevitable Demise, How Tall Can A Human Get?: An Impartial Review by 2 Average Height Men, Mark Teaches Ethan Korean, Bigfoot is Real and It Ate My Friend, The End of Unus Annus is Almost Here..., We Explore the Unus Annus Subreddit for Your Delicious Memes, How Big Can a Nuke Get?, How Much Caffeine Does It Take to Kill a Man?, Drinking Real THICC Water... How Bad Does It Taste?, We Played Strip Poker, Harnessing Our Yodeling Power to End The World As We Know It, Mark Cooks Blindfolded While Ethan Guides Him Through FaceTime, We Play the Newlywed Game While Consuming That Which Will Kill the Other, DIY Boob, We Have the Best Bellies on Youtube, The Unus Annus Confessional Booth, DO NOT OPEN UNTIL 2080, Only UNUS-es May Watch This Video, Only ANNUS-es May Watch This Video, Only Watch from 2:15 to 6:11 - Do Not Watch Any Other Part of This Video, DIY Wine, Tearing a Phone Book in Half with Our Huge Manly Muscles, 2 Complete Amateurs Enter a Body Building Competition, BLACK LIVES MATTER, Crushing Watermelons Betwixt Our Mighty Thighs, Morphing Our Bodies Into Superhero Poses, Reacting to Your Hilarious Green Screen Memes, Mark Teaches Ethan to Read with Hooked on Phonics, Ethan Roasts Mark for 15 Minutes Straight, There's Something Horribly Wrong with This Picture..., Attempting to Build IKEA Furniture Without Instructions, Mark and Ethan Become United States Citizens, We Made Fanart for Each Other, Our Fans Try to Scare Us with Their Homemade Creepypasta, Recreating Childhood Photos, Will We Break the Boards... Or Will They Break Us?, Finding the Most Cursed Image on the Internet, Learning to Cry on Command to Increase Our YouTube Views, Pee Sauna, Building IKEA's Hardest Piece of Furniture Without Instructions is Impossible, Becoming One With the Horse, The Ultimate Paper Airplane Showdown, Creating Mark FISHbach, Learning How to Lock Pick (FBI Please Don't Watch), The Most Dangerous Shave, Ethan Traps Mark's Soul in the Palm of his Hand, Bear Trapping 101: An Elegant Knot For An Elegant Beast, 2 Men In a Trench Coat Teach You How to Save Money at the Movies, Building the World's First IKEA Boat, Ethan Teaches Mark How to Swim, 10 Miracle Products to Give YOU the Thiccest Jaw on Planet Earth, 2 Dirty Boys Wash Their Filthy Mouths Out With Soap, Mark is Guilty. Ethan Has the Proof., Recreating Mark's Childhood, We Put an Apple Watch in a Rock Tumbler, Dummy THICC for Dummies - A Tale of 2 Butts - Pushing Our Butts Even Further Beyond, Reverse Engineering a Kite to Steal the Idea of Electricity From Benjamin Franklin, The Candy Bra Challenge, Mark and Ethan Look at a Puppy for 10 Minutes, Unus Annus Try Pole Dancing, This Is Hiding On Your Body RIGHT NOW., Tasting Weird Food Combos: Pickles and Chocolate? Ice Cream and Soy Sauce?, The Unus Annus Space Program, The Egg Smashing Game, Can You Bake a Cookie from Cookie Dough Ice Cream?, Bleachus Annus, Dunking Oreos In Literally Anything But Milk, Preparing a 5-Star Meal for Our Youtube Famous Dogs, DIY Teeth, How to Escape from a Hostage Situation, Does This Magnetic Skincare Routine Really Work?, Diy Bed of Nails : Oh God, Please Don't Ever Try This, The Human Mop, Can Sound Therapy Heal All Wounds?, This Is The Most Dangerous Children's Toy Ever Made, Would Chica Save Us From Drowning?, We Do It Better Than Icarus Ever Could, The Beginning of The End, The Annual Unus Annus Dunk Contest, Ultimate Horseshoes, A Serious Conversation Under the Stars, Recharging Our Phones Using Only Brute Strength, 5 Products to Grow Your Patchy Beard, Mark Teaches Ethan How to Play the Trumpet, Playing Cards: The World's Deadliest Weapon, We Lubed Our Floor for a Sliding Competition, Breaking Glass With Our Screams, This Is Goodbye, Mark and Ethan Share a Drink, The Wubble, Mark and Ethan Shave Chica, DO NOT TRY THIS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, Judging Your Terrible Unus Annus Ideas, Hydro Dipping A Baby, Popping Popcorn with a High-Powered Laser, Puberty Simulator, Grip Strength Test: Loser Becomes the Winner's Butler for a Day, Momiplier Teaches Self-Defense, Transforming Mark into the 8th Wonder of the World, Playing Children's Games in Total Darkness, We're Better Than Dogs, The Koala Challenge: TikTok's Intimate Couple's Trend, 1 Gallon of Jello Nearly Broke Us, Too Many Pickles, Pitching a Tent in the Woods But There's a Bear 15 Feet Away, How to Rescue a Cat from a Tree, A Bear Attacked Us in the Middle of the Night, How to Safely Bury Your Friend, Team Building for 2: Trust Fall, Tug-of-War, and More!, How to Start a Fire (except don't...), Mark's Outdoor Escape Room, Hunting HeeHoo, Was 2020 a Bad Year for Unus Annus?, Mark Gives Ethan a HOT (stone) Massage, We Smell Every Smell, How Many Slaps Does It Take to Cook a Chicken?, 2 Boys 2 Poops, Mark Teaches Ethan How to March in a Marching Band, We Finally Drank Our DIY Wine, 2 Adults Take a 4th Grade Math Test, Making Snow Cones With Literally Anything But Normal Flavors, We Attempt Pottery Without Amy's Help, Can Plants Feel Pain?, How Far Can We Chuck a 16lbs Rock?, We Pierced Each Other's Ears, We Ate Dog Treats So You Don't Have To, We Accidentally Made an SCP While Amy Was Away, BEYBLADE NUTBALL, Making the Ultimate Unus Annus Burger, Making Soda With Literally Anything But Soda, Pee Soda, Learning to Use The Force, Brick Soccer, We Attempt to Make Holy Water, Amy Sent Us a Mystery Box, Mark Knows What Ethan Did..., This Video Will Never Make Sense, We Attempt to Make UNHOLY Water, We Will Churn Thy Butter, Ethan Teaches Mark Gymnastics, The Great Ice Cream Cake Race, Mark Teaches Ethan to Wrestle, Ethan Watches as Mark Achieves the Impossible, Consuming the World's Hottest Chip, This Video Went Completely Out of Control, The 1000 High Five Challenge, Bobbing For Apples But the Water Keeps Getting Thiccer, Mark Breaks His Nose On An Aerial Hoop, Mark and Ethan Milk a Goat, Shooting Archery ON A HORSE, DIY Minesweeper, Literally Finding a Needle in a Haystack, Drawing on Each Other's Backs in Total Darkness, This is For FUN and NOT a Fetish, Mark Conquers His Fear of Night Swimming, The Painful World of Aerial Silks, We Bought Every Grinch Costume on Ebay, Pumpkin Taste Tier List, Learn to Jump Higher in 16 Minutes and 16 Seconds, Bobbing For Literally Anything But Apples, This Video is Completely Unedited, Momiplier Tells Us True Scary Stories from Korea, Pumpkin Spice "Challenge", Mark and Ethan Build a Scarecrow, Pressure Washing Our Sins Away, We Force Mark to Swim in the Ocean: His Greatest Fear, Fighting Fish to the Death in the Deep Blue Sea, Cryptid Olympics, Phasmophobia in Real Life, Edward Pumpkin Hands, Blood Bath, The Unus Annus Annual Costume Contest, Ethan Turns Mark into a Werewolf, Ethan Kidnapped Mark, The Truth of Unus Annus, Accepting the Truth, The Unus Annus Last Supper, Being Brutally Honest with Each Other, Recreating Every Single Unus Annus Video, All Our Video Ideas That Never Happened, Who's Cutting Onions In Here???, The 1st Annual Unus Annus Roast, God's Fitness Test, Saying Goodbye to All Our Guests, Everything's Legal If You're Dead, 7 Minutes in Heaven 7 Minutes in Hell, The Unus Annus Annual Sleepover, Goodbye.

Soundtrack: Kate Bush - "Misty" from 50 Words for Snow Deerhunter - "Green Jacket" from Microcastle Portishead - "Threads" from Third Link to Spotify playlist (with songs from previous chapters): https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6EICNzLmCJELZPA9NXANI2
July 19, 2015 | evening
“So just to reiterate: I put the British one into the Stone. I hand the heretic over now. And then you let me go? With my sword?”
“That’s correct.”
“No strings attached? I just go back to hunting?”
“Ms. Cruz, we’ll even provide the Armory's numerous resources to make your job easier. We want the same thing as you and so many others: a vampire-free world. But we can hardly discuss the deal when you seem to be missing an important bargaining chip.”
“You really think I would trust you enough to bring my only asset in with me? Forgive me for finding it hard to believe the slimy, manipulative antique-collector-turned-supernatural-prison-warden who’s never kept up her end of a deal in her life.”
“You purport to know so much about me. To always be one step ahead of your enemies. But I’ve been on this Earth for only a fraction of the time you’ve been alive and I’ve still managed to outsmart you.”
“What are you—”
"So arrogant. Powerful enough to kill vampires ten times your age. Yet at the end of the day, you are just one woman. Felled by tranquilizer darts just as I, the lowly human, would be. Alright everyone, she’s down, you know what to do. She’ll have stashed the heretic somewhere close. Find her before whatever Rayna used to put her down wears off.”
December 7, 2013 | afternoon

Dear Elena, There are times when I miss you so much that I can’t bring myself to write you a letter, and then there are times when I’m doing so well that all I want to do is tell my best friend about it. This is neither—my heart aches for you, it HURTS, but there are certain things that I feel like I can’t tell anyone other than you. You were always so good about not judging me, even in the phases of my life when I was at my judgiest (remember how I acted around Stefan at first? Oh how things change…). Anyways, the thing is, I like someone. A lot. It’s new and it’s scary and I do NOT know what to do about it. God, this sounds like a diary entry I would’ve written about that kid Dean back in elementary school that all three of us had a crush on, but it’s true. What’s strange is that it’s a girl. I always wondered what it would be like to be into girls, thought about it a lot, but it was just never the same as with guys. And then I met her. I really wish you weren’t asleep so I could ask you what the HELL is with these 100+ year-old vampires that turn us into mush. I mean, I used to be the moral compass of our little group. And now I’m pining over a mass-murderer. Caroline and I have been talking a lot about vampirism and what it means, ethically and so on, but I still get these occasional flashes of doubt, like “what the hell are you doing justifying all this they KILL people for God’s sake.” I don’t know if that will ever go away, and I suppose it’s a good thing, not to forget how viscerally terrible so much of the stuff we have gone through (and are currently going through) is. But I don’t think about any of it when I’m with her. Three days ago I hated her guts and now I can’t stop thinking about her. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before and Elena I need you to be here so you can put your hands on my shoulders and tell me to breathe and calm down and then give me the most logical, comforting friend solution ever like you always do. (Looking at that written down it looks like sarcasm but it’s not I promise.) So I guess instead of writing this whole letter I could have just written two sentences. One, “I’m a hopeless romantic who is going to get her heart shattered yet again”; and two, “Elena I miss you so much I can’t breathe.” Wherever you are, in your dreams or whatever your brain is doing while you sleep, I hope you’re happy. I hope it’s better in there than it is out here. And that we’ll have it all fixed for you when you wake up. Love always, Bonnie

She sets her pen down with a satisfyingly finality. It feels good to actually write a letter completely, from start to finish, without interruption. After she finished handing out the gifts, Bonnie headed to Scull to try and get some weekend preparation in for her Occult in the Mediterranean and Contemporary Black American Literature finals next week, but she ended up just sitting and zoning in and out on one of the way-too-comfortable leather armchairs, mindlessly refilling her mug of coffee and listening to Kate Bush through her earbuds. She keeps telling herself she isn’t still upset from this morning, but deep down she can’t stop catastrophizing about Nora and Mary Louise; imagining not them getting back together, but rather the latter re-corrupting the former. Bonnie is aware that, romantically at least, she can’t compete with one hundred and thirty years of love and intimacy. But she cares enough about Nora already to hope for her redemption. And spending any amount of time with Mary Louise is not how one redeems oneself.
Bonnie is usually somewhat annoyed—inconvenienced, at least—when she inevitably sees someone she knows while she’s studying, reading, or just fucking around on her laptop at Scull (a situation in which that pesky social contract recommends an awkward interaction consisting of at least two full stumbling, half-assed exchanges), but at the moment she’s half pleading for even the most distant acquaintance to stop by so she actually has an excuse not to be reviewing Greek Traveler factions from the Hellenistic period, or reading the last third of Fran Ross’s Oreo, or thinking about Nora. Damn it. She hoped that writing the letter to Elena would help with the last part, but thoughts of both the brunette heretic and the blonde devil-on-her-shoulder still saturate her already overloaded mind.
Now she’s looking at an older guy, probably late 30s—on Saturdays the usual student-heavy crowd was often overwhelmed by people who simply lived in the town, a trend that wasn’t exactly promising for her valid-distraction contingency plan—at a table across the room who’s bent over a large stack of papers. None of the sheets are stapled together and there’s a large envelope next to them so Bonnie deduces that it’s some sort of manuscript. He has several different-colored pens and post-it notes that he occasionally uses to mark things on the pages. What he’s doing is clearly work, but his face shows no disdain or even boredom.
Bonnie’s never really thought about what her life is going to look like after (or—she shudders— if ) she finishes school. She used to think about it a lot, especially the summer before junior year when her dad started asking her about applications and her naïve young brain whirled with the simultaneously anxious and hopeful fantasies of the future, but ever since she discovered the supernatural everything else has seemed so... trivial. And now the two people in the world she wanted to make proud with what she accomplished, her Grams and her dad, are both gone, both taken from her by forces beyond her control. Supernatural forces. How is she supposed to live a “normal” life after this? Grow up to be the “kooky lady who teaches occult studies at the university” just like Grams, doing spells on the side to stay sane? Work for some giant corporation that employs thousands of people, none of whom have any idea of the terrifying danger that passes unseen right under their noses? How could she relate to anyone when so much about her life relies on the knowledge of a secret, one terrible secret whose tremendous weight everyone seems to have forgotten, that will hang over every new friendship or other relationship like a bulbous storm cloud biding its time in order to ruin everything at the worst possible moment. Maybe she could find some hidden witch club in New York, or meet some extremely friendly vampires in Seattle. But even in her head these possibilities seem impossibly far-fetched, and she knows she’ll probably never find any more of a family than the one she has made here. A family that is now drifting apart before her very eyes.
She misses Jeremy. Not really strong-sexy-hunter-turns-her-legs-to-jelly Jeremy but her friend Jeremy, the one who kept the fact that she was dead a secret (even though she now knows, and probably even knew then, that was a horrible thing to ask him to do) and stopped her from wasting away on the Other Side, who made her feel like she was truly home when she was getting used to being the Anchor, who taught her how to roll the perfect joint and held her as she cried about her dad and laughed at stupid reality TV with her. Bonnie would give anything for a friend like that right now.
​
* * *
The meager pre-winter sun has started to set, and Bonnie knows she’ll get even less done once the bar turns on their cozy amber lights to offset the darkness outside. She shoves her books and notes into her bag, slips her coat on, and begins on the short walk back to her dorm, leaning her head forward to shield her face from the sharp icy air. She’s trying to remember if she has anything to eat for dinner; she ate the leftover Indian takeout for lunch and some soup Stefan had made the evening before that... damn. Might have to go out again. After escaping the prison world and vowing to never eat a single pancake, whipped cream fangs or not, ever again, she’s gradually gone fully vegan. Enough death and destruction already, she thought. Some things are cheaper now, some are more expensive, everything ends up pretty much the same anyway. Maybe she’ll swing by the little Asian market down the street and pick up some noodles and veggies or something, she thinks as she half-jogs up the creaky stairs to her floor and flicks her wrist to unlock the door to the room, except it’s already unlocked, maybe Caroline didn’t find some random weekend baby project to keep herself occupied like she assumed, maybe she’s—
But opening the door reveals Nora, sitting on the bed crying just as she had been last night, although this time she had not yet changed out of her perfect outfit. She’d courteously removed her mud-and-snow-covered boots just inside the door and Bonnie thinks her pale pink socks are the cutest things ever. The witch snaps out of it. Something happened with Mary Louise. Something bad.
“I guess it didn’t go well,” Bonnie says. Almost certainly an understatement.
“She called me a charity case,” Nora laments with a sniffle. “And the only reason she was there was to hear me apologize to her. I mean, the nerve. I—”
“Why don’t I get you a tissue?”
“Oh, it’s all right. I’ve used one of your hideous tops.”
“...Which is now your hideous top.” In any other situation Bonnie might have been irritated but right now she can’t muster a care at all. She didn’t wear it much anyway, to be honest; it wasn’t quite hideous, just bland. Nora is clearly not a fan of “bland,” however. Bonnie chuckles, then decides to be bold. Her face sets into seriousness. “Can I ask you what... might sound like a mean question?” She plops down next to Nora on the end of her bed.
“Please, fire away,” Nora says, sniffing again, “it’s not like I’m in a fragile state or anything.” The sarcasm is palpable but not excessive. She’s learning.
Bonnie’s done joking though. “What do you see in her?” she questions firmly, and is immediately met with a look of surprise. Okay, that was a bit harsh. Maybe one joke. “Aside from the fact that she looks like a blonde Angelina Jolie.”
Nora shows no sign of recognition; she probably has no idea who Angelina Jolie is. But she answers the initial query: “She’s loving, protective, kind.”
Bonnie’s heard that one before. “But just to you ,” she says, trying and failing to keep the exasperation out of her voice.
Nora makes a touché sound and looks away for a second. “That’s fair,” she concedes. “She does always think of me first.” It’s clear she’s trying to stop crying, but the tears keep sneaking down her cheeks in clear trails that reflect the orange light of the lamps. “Maybe I’m spoiled. Or old-fashioned, but... it’s nice having that one person who doesn’t need anything from you. Who just loves you, and thinks you’re the most amazing, beautiful girl in the whole world, you know?” She looks to Bonnie for some sign of agreement upon the “you know,” but receives none. “Maybe. Maybe you don’t.”
“I don’t need someone to tell me I’m pretty,” Bonnie responds, jokingly but defiantly.
Nora laughs. “Nobody needs it. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t feel good to hear it.”
They just sit there looking at each other for what could be three seconds or three hours before Nora suddenly gets up from the bed as if she had been prodded with one of the fireplace pokers. “Thank you, for today, and yesterday, and... well, you know,” she says, nervously moving her hands around, not knowing where to put them. “You’re a... very kind person, and…”—she hesitates a bit, before saying the next word a bit more slowly and carefully, as if she liked the way it felt to pronounce it—“...beautiful. Even if you can somehow go from that goddess attire you were wearing last night to this monstrosity,” she says as she holds up the tear-soiled top.
All Bonnie can muster is a short “hmmm” because her heart is going haywire. The temperature in the room soared at least three degrees when Nora called her beautiful. She desperately hopes she’s more composed on the outside than she feels on the inside.
Nora starts to walk toward the door, but right away her cell phone beeps. After she reads whatever message came she turns to face Bonnie again, except this time her face is a mask of fury and betrayal. “I guess I was wrong.”
“What?” Bonnie’s confused.
“You and your friends are not kind at all,” Nora says tersely.
“Nora, wait. Whatever you’re talking about, I have no idea. I’ve been studying all day and haven’t heard from anyone, I swear.”
Nora shakes her head back and forth like an overwhelmed child. “I don’t believe you.” Bonnie’s gotten up from the bed and is stepping away from Nora, who keeps moving closer. She wouldn’t hurt me after all this, would she?
“Please. Think about it. If I hated you enough to be a part of some scheme against you, why would I let myself get roped into investing this much time into it? I’m the witch, I’m always helping, I’m not gonna spend a total of what, six to seven hours plus a whole night of sleep being some undercover obstructer!” Bonnie’s reached the back wall, which faces the door. Nora’s stopped walking toward her but she still doesn’t look convinced. “Tell me. Tell me what happened.”
“You know what happened!” Nora yells tearfully. The lamps rattle and a fire ignites in the previously flame-free hearth.
“Calm down. I’m telling you I don’t. You can either believe me and we can figure this out or you can hurt the person who took the leap of faith of forgiving you.” Bonnie’s running through attack spells in her head as a backup plan. Anti-magic field first, then burst her brain, then a binding spell around the wrists and ankles. She’s practiced it a million times.
Nora drops her bared hands. “They’ve taken Mary Louise,” she says, her bottom lip trembling.
Bonnie’s eyelids slowly close in realization. Those idiots . “Who?”
“I don’t know. Julian didn’t say.”
“Julian? You’re trusting him?”
“I have to when it comes to her. He wouldn’t lie to me about this. And I... I can’t…”
“I know, I know.” Bonnie’s trying to calm down. She’s a bit terrified and just needs Nora to leave at this point. “Go. I will call everyone and try to figure out what the hell is going on.” Nora is gone in a flash. Bonnie knows full well it’s Stefan and Valerie’s crackpot plan to draw Julian back into town. Someone is going to die because of this. If it’s Mary Louise, Nora may never forgive her. She can't think about what would happen if it's anyone else.
Bonnie waits for a minute until Nora is definitely out of vamp-hearing range and then quickly dials Stefan’s number. He doesn’t pick up the first two times but answers on the third. His infuriatingly unconcerned “Hello” is unceremoniously cut off by Bonnie’s “Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“Well, it’s nice to hear your voice too.”
“Julian just texted Nora and told her about Mary Louise, so now you have two vicious, angry vampires headed your way. Thought you should know.”
“We expected as much. It’s all part of the plan.”
Bonnie is fuming. “You don’t think you could have clued me in, Stefan? Nora came close to killing me because she thought I was in on it. Was that ‘part of the plan’?”
“Well if I had clued you in, wouldn’t you be in on it?”
“Fuck you.” Fuming has become seething. “I don’t know what’s happened to you and I don’t care. But I assure you, if anyone I love dies tonight because of your stupid plot, I will kill you. And if it’s you I won’t give a shit.”
“Bonnie—”
She hangs up, not knowing.
Not knowing that Nora, still driving to Mystic Falls, will arrive about half an hour too late to stop anything from happening—Julian hadn’t wanted her to be involved.
Not knowing that about ten minutes from now, while she lies on her bed with her knees up and her stomach twisted up in anxious knots, Julian will kill both Stefan and Damon with the Phoenix Sword, Bonnie’s final words (among other things) ringing over and over in both of their heads as they descend into unimaginable, spiraling, merciless hell.
Not knowing that once freed from her restraints, in an act of both self-destruction and misplaced hatred, Mary Louise will rip the Sword from Damon’s heart and plunge it into Valerie’s before fleeing with her rescuer.
Not knowing that she has a very long and exhausting winter break ahead of her.
​
​
July 19, 2015 | night
“I suppose this is karma. For all the years of misery and suffering you have caused my family and so many others. You took Beau’s voice from him, made him live in fear of your return. Remember? Because he does. I do."
“...”
“I wonder, did you really think that they would just let you go once you gave me over? Or is it that somewhere in the back of that scrambled vampire-loathing brain of yours, you wanted to be caught?” “Why would I want to be in here? Now I’m forced to deal with all my horrible psychic visions and can’t even do anything about them. I feel naked without my sword. I would never intentionally part with it.”
“Then why the bloody hell did you?”
“I... I don’t know. I can’t explain but it just…”
“...seemed like the right thing to do?”
“Yeah, that’s it. How’d you know?”
“There’s something about this place. Something... magnetic. I’ve always felt it but just sort of brushed it off.”
“Think harder. What exactly is it? You know, deep down. Can’t you hear her voice? My voice?"
"Wait. How are you in here? Why are they letting us talk?”
“They aren’t. And I’m not really Rayna Cruz. Someone else, someone you’re not ready for yet. You could call me the basement tenant, I suppose. You won’t remember any of this, but tonight I begin rewiring your brain. You’ll be mine soon enough.”

The Book of Doom
Living the Dream
Intro
Story of a time traveller trapped in a world where everything is backwards.
I’ve possibly never had an original thought. Everything is already written. I’m just discovering. I’ve lived my life and been manipulated left right and centre.
I love everyone.
I think I’ve rarely been conscious. My friends say i day dream more than participate in thought.
I think I’ve mastered life though & people in power know & are following me.
My whole life is a lie.
The whole world is a stage.
From genocide, world war & Jesus.
I’ve lived life just letting life take me.
It feels real but none of it feels like my own.
I’m writing this in a mental hospital for my own sanity maybe this will help you if you have gone through an awakening
The population to resources is a shambles but with technology and everyone working together we could turn the world green :)
They’re going to implement change through a world war where we will have no choice but to work together.
I’ve pretty much lived life for my mother and father, followed them all my life. My next job could be at the Chatsworth house. Working for the Duke of Devonshire.
I was stressed working with my mum, she ran a catering business and my Gran has moved to Greece. Alls I did from 15-17 was play video games. Outdoors had got violent and territorial. Xbox multiplayer came out and the introverts stayed in.
I played a pc game called Visual Utopia. It was an mopg, 2D map with around 200 players. A turn based strategy game, like hunger games, chess, fort nite, RISK & C&C all in one. You landed with 50 soldiers in a unit & had to find a place to settle, find friends & create a kingdom to survive. I hated it and loved it at the same time.
At 17 I moved to Greece with intensions of staying or coming back after a summer like I did. I convinced Gay to come with me before hand, I went but he couldn’t because of his dad. He came over a month later though. Damon was on holiday there with lads from work, he’d already booked before the idea and said he’d stay when I came over. Damon stayed two months and Gay stayed 1 month. Gav came back and got a job in Livingstones. I came back five months later and my neighbour got me a job in Bar Centro working for Noah the next week. I said to my mum, give me a year I’ll be manager. I was supervisor trainee manager after six months, after a year, Noah offered me managers job and a shit salary so I turned it down. He took me on holiday, now I black out when I’m drunk and I remember nothing of the holiday but I have a memory of him threatening to kill me if the truth gets out.
I’ve spent many family holidays with my mum in Greece. Me & mum loved to travel. She also took me to Paris twice, which a fell in love with but I was most fascinated by Greece, their history & architecture. From what I heard, Greek Mafia had their hands in bit coin & some of the common folk had ancestors from Zimbabwe which when I asked them about they was shady and avoided the question, as if they we’re wondering how I knew.
Here my life pretty much begins. My parents split at the age of seven. My mum and dad worked in bars, Bradbury Club, which has been torn down now. My dad was all round handy man pretty much managing the place, my mum worked the bars.
The split was rough. Me and dad moved to a flat in Grangewood then to Brimington where my Nan lived. My dads mum.

• Contents :)

Chapter One - Age Seven
Chapter Two - Age Eight to Fourteen
Chapter Three - Age Fifteen to Sixteen.
Chapter Four - Age Seventeen
Chapter Five - Age Eighteen to Nineteen
Chapter Six - Age Twenty
Chapter Seven - Age Twenty One
Chapter Eight - Age Twenty Two to Twenty three
Theory of everything contents
The more wisdom and philosophy we attain the more heavenly life is
Wisdom is the truth known consciously
Truth is what has consistent value
We are all connected
We are the centre of the universe
We are an accumulation of our ancestors
Consciousness is the manifestation of interactions
We are a sum total of our experiences
Free will is a form of self control
Frustration is the door to perception
Hell is the burning desire for this moment to be different. Heaven is the present moment
Gratitude is the state of mastership
Everything is a phase
Good is to do love onto another; out of love for yourself, to make one love oneself. Evil is to inflict suffering on to another; out of hate for yourself, to make one hate oneself
We attract what we fear, we become what we hate
Unconditional love does not mean unconditional behaviour
Karma is when you don’t learn your lesson the same situation repeats until you accept your mistakes & make the changes.
The universe; inner and outer, is a spiral, what goes around comes back around
Change your mind, change the world around you
Our purpose is to express ourselves in order to understand ourselves and the universe
Alls life is is a story going back in time to understand creation
We are time travellers
Knowledge is power

• Chapter one. - Age seven

My dad was an all round handy man. He was a carpenter in his spare time to earn us extra cash. We loved building things together or, I loved copying him.
I met Tricky, Gay & Alan at Brimington Junior School. Me and Tricky lived on the same street. We became friends when two girls stole his shoe and I just happened to be there. We became very good friends. We loved playing with action figures & watching Dragon Ball Z. Tricky was a bit mardy, hated playing outdoors and hated PC but I loved playing Age of Empires at his. With Gay & Alan, we loved to play outdoors & have tea at each other’s houses, throughout life we have loved building things together. I joined cubs with Tricky & I went to karate with Tricky.
I also gained three step brothers from my mums side. Daniel, Mathew & Liam. My brothers always stuck up for me and I looked up to Daniel, he was awesome :) we all loved building things together, playing blind mans bluff & man hunt. We also played for our local Rugby team & was learning to box at the local boxing club. Me and Liam played in the same team at rugby, under 11’s because I was small enough to be a back and get away with it even though I was 13 :) Me and Mathew was too big for me at boxing and Liam was too small for me so I never really got a fair fight. Mathew also joined the choir at the Crooked Spire :)
My Gran was amazing to me. Now let’s get to her. :) She was a very faithful woman, adored by the church and had great piano skills. She was well respected and played piano for the church. She used to get tons of Christmas cards. I loved learning to play piano with her, well, a little. :) she used to always play classical music and we’d drink orange juice and elderflower which is still a favourite, thanks Nan :) We could never say the Lords name in vein, my dad and her friend are the one’s that got me and Tricky into cubs :)
A rough part of my life in general this was. It was rough on the streets, fighting and territorial gangs of kids. I had baby sitters from a young age. Even before the break up. After the break up. I had mark bottoms who came from my street. He was still a kid really. Probably only 15. He used to bully me and beat me up. I blocked out most of my memory but I remember being trapped under a table being hit with poles. After one night another one of the baby sitters kicked him out, I called him a ginger twat down the street then he chased me to the shops and tripped me over. Fun :)
In Boythorpe I wasn’t having much more luck at my mums either. We was just being kids, taunting shop keepers when one dragged me into the shop. They then grabbed an arm each and started beating me, lovely stuff :) The shop keepers fled the country.
So I had a rough family break up that resulted in police tearing us apart and I was being beaten left right and centre :)

• Chapter two - Age Eight to Thirteen.

By age thirteen I’d made lots of new friends and felt more comfortable. School was fun, the work was not. I’d took up ju jitsu as a hobby, I was a natural and stuck at it two years. :) I remember learning to draw in perspective, 3D in the younger years, creating a tin can alley to raise money for charity and having the dinner lady steal the earnings, lovely stuff. :) We’d play army with our imagination, we’d play pokemon cards & bulldog, the usual stuff kids we’re playing :)
I met a bunch of other more friends along the way, Ryan Turner, Luke Spyra, Damon Shaw, Daniel Stirling, Daniel Wood etc... I met Luke Spyra on the parks through Ryan Turner I met in school through girls we used to associate with. I fancied the girl that fancied Turner so I clung to Turner to learn everything I could from him. He’s still a close friend now. I met Stirling & Woody through school. I met Damon on the streets. He came from Manchester and his uncle was once the head of defence :)
I don’t remember doing any work during school because I basically didn’t do it. :) I was very lazy & unimaginative when it came to writing, I could never produce more than three lines worth of writing. I wasn’t made for school. I remember playing something maybe called the game of life where we all had to pretend to be adults and work out our expenses, what we could afford and couldn’t afford, that was fun :) I remember in nursery my favourite thing to do was build with the blocks & I built a small bird house out of wood for my nursery teacher when I left because me loved her :) 13-15 was the good life after that where we just played and paid no attention to school. I spent most of my time day dreaming not bothering other kids so I got away with doing nothing :) At 15 I said I’d get 3 GCSE’s just incase and I got myself. Maths, Science & Electronics. I had a passion for business :)
Around this age, we moved twice and my dad had met Jean, we spent some time on Somerset drive where we’d play football, be more building & fighting. Jean was wonderful to us, she studied at university, loved classical music and would help me out with my english gcse :) we loved camping holidays. Unfortunately Jean died of cancer, along side my dad’s best friend who was like an uncle to us and joined us on holidays. My Dad’s life wasn’t getting much better :(
If I wasn’t at school I was at work :) I got my first wage packet at about 9 years or younger, cleaning with my aunt for £2.50. I used to work paper rounds with my brother at eleven and at 13 I had my own paper round. At 15 I was skipping school to labour for my step father plastering :)
I learned for a while and owned a drum kit & a electric Guitar at this time. We’d also all love playing Warhammer & getting eight players linked up to two Xbox’s in my shed & having BBQ’s in the summers
I was accident prone too, by this time I had broken my arm three times & my fingers once. One time at band camp my arm actually snapped in half, I stood up and immediently snapped it back in to place after my older brother threw my over his shoulders :) Proud moment. Aha

• Chapter three. - Age Fifteen to Sixteen

At fifteen we we’re pressured into making life choices, internet is becoming more popular. Streets are getting rougher and Xbox bought an online console out with Halo. Things got weird. We all started playing VU. I was mardy because Xbox had taken everyone indoors. But at-least I had VU. It had took a grasp on me and I became addicted. I played along side Turner, Gav, Adam, Damon, Straw, Stirlin & Woody. This was a rare time the game got a good flow of players.
I felt like there was a strange secret kept from me. I remember at one point in my life not being able to know something because I’m ginger as a joke. I linked it to VU lol.
Everyone but me and stirlin stopped playing, Stirlin was the founder. I became obsessed. I thought it was the most simple intelligent fun game there was on offer & I still do aha.
There was a kingdom called Legacy, pretty much like our illuminati of the world, all the veterans together undefeated. Well, I was determined to defeat them aha :) I set out on my own on a lower world to them where the noobs roam, Mantrax. I found two other players and created a kingdom called Trio, The Three Musketeers. All for one, one for all was our motto :) we became legendary in three era’s on the lower world. I had gathered about 20 noobs and was leading them all, teaching them how to play at the same time. We dominated every Era. On the fourth Era we went to the top world, Fantasia, where LGC roam and we defeated them :) Each era, Armageddon is cast by the winning kingdom and we all reincarnate again.
I wrote guides on this game. I was bar shit passionate about it, I felt like I was mastering life and Visual Utopia at the same time. I’ve met from the game probably around 200 people from all around the world and been trolled by nearly all of them :D I never felt respected by LGC but I felt respected and loved by other players. They mostly loved me :)
This game took over my life and I became depressed though between 15 & 17 whilst playing I was also working.
At Fifteen I started working for a company with my mum, it was silver service, waiting on for the three masons, on a steam train & weddings at Eyam Hall where the Black Plague started.
I was also working with my step dad plastering. I was working with Daniel Straw’s step dad landscaping & mechanics. I was left to change a gear box by myself lol. I did some bricklaying with Scott, my mum’s neighbour and with Damon Shaw’s Uncle Chris a couple of times.
I was also at College part time as well as school doing a bricklaying & painting & decorating City & Guilds
By 17 came I was out of work & stuck in just college not satisfied with my earnings or the fact I failed my driving test five times so, I moved to Greece :)

• Chapter Four - Age 17

At seventeen Greece was the time of my life. Bars. Booze. Boobs. Beach parties & work :) I started at a bowling alley for a Greek Australian friend of my Nans with Damon. We had accommodation right on the beach next door to Mac Donald’s. Atleast 15 units of alcohol a night for 5 months :)
It was legendary. Gav came and by then we’d been kicked out of our first apartment and had an upgrade. It had a separate kitchen and bathroom with two massive bedrooms each. When Damon and Gav left, I had one of these to myself :)
I started smoking weed with my new manager and became supervisor of a night club and hosted poker nights in my kitchen after work.
I still believe Faliraki was the best place for British workers because of the community we all had. I spent the first two weeks with my Nan by myself, once Damon arrived it was all go :)
We lived off Mac Donald’s, Subway, chips & cheese or a Gyros, one meal a day aha We spent our days adventuring the island, sun bathing and go karting :)
I got back just before my eighteenth birthday. I caught up with everyone and the drinking continue’d :) Gav loved vodka and so did Straw. I got a job in Bar Centro and Gav got a job in Livingstones. I remember we would down half a bottle of vodka each before we went out. I never drank around town until my eighteenth birthday. It was drinking at parks, houses and the streets from fifteen up until now but I could get away with drinking in Brimington pubs before I was legal :)
I continue’d playing vu throughout this and we had now all started using Skype :)

• Chapter Five - Age Eighteen to Nineteen

I loved my job at Bar Centro. I was getting paid for a social life. Sunday BBQ’s became a thing. Unfortunately Noah was married and sleeping with a girl that had friend zoned me, even told me she wants someone like me but not me. I learnt about the affair and this caused problems at work in the end. I was close to Laura, I never let it effect work until about twelve months in. I was taken on holiday to a fake maga reunion, at one point they was posing as night club owners to Ultra Beat and introducing me as manager as if we had a club big enough lol. I remember very little of the holiday, it’s all a blur but I remember being by a pool at one point. They sent me home at night once so they could have fun with women. I remember Nick telling me in the car if his wife found out I’m dead and he doesn’t care who my dad’s are.
A few more months of working and I’m offered salary and managers job. I was expected to work 50 hours a week, clean, manage the cellar & bar for 200 a week plus ten cash. I turned it down and I didn’t leave quick enough so they put a ban on phones then drew lines around my phone to see if I move and when I moved it they sacked me or I walked out there and then.
Lauren Whittaker joined in mid game and was sleeping with me and Nick.
I quickly got myself a job at escapade where I met Joe Mosley, Kirk Bytheway & Daniel Drew who became friends for years. I had a short fling with Hannah sellars I knew from Daniel Straws sister. Town had an awesome gang of workers, we was a little community, we often merged up with other bar workers for parties at each other’s houses. Summer peaked I became less interested in work, more interested in women & having sex. I got sacked at escapade for not taking the job seriously and spending more time dancing than working before my trial ended. I had also picked up another job at Vesuvius, a factory. So I didn’t care.
I got another job in brand new bar in town. I was also offered a job to run the bar and take a % with Gary Gee. I turned it down because Gary Gee was very Un organised and I’d have had to do all the work to turn the bar around. It was a failure. He framed me for stealing a tenner then sacked me lol.
I’m 19-20 now and round about this I met Leanne Moore :)

• Chapter Six - Age Nineteen to Twenty One

Leanne knew Beck who was the sister of a girl I worked worked with. I was sleeping with Beck for a month before Leanne attached herself to me, we had sex in the night clubs, neither of them we’re happy when they found out I was sleeping with them both. I saw this as a way out and a start at a fresh life. I dropped Beck for Leanne and she became my everything. I was hopelessly in love. We lasted twelve to eighteen months on and off planning life and she wanted out in the end, I spent most of my time telling her to wake up and getting stressed at all the pressure she was putting on me.
I was made redundant at Vesuvius a few months in & I started working at Dominoes as a delivery driver with Luke Spyra as manager. Leanne has been going to university at Hull and I have been spending my time working full time and partying with Leanne in Hull. We loved each other too much to be apart, we went together like two peas in a pod, we was both dreamers and hard workers, very passionate people and we both clashed and argue’d a lot.
Her dad worked at Royal Mail and we decided it would be a good idea for me to get a job there. Me and her dad we’re pretty similar, both computer geeks & fiercely competitive. They used to call me stupid together and taunt me, her mum would stick up for me. They made me feel like family and bullied me at the same time
So I applied at Royal Mail a few times & got a job at Chesterfield, the head office of Royal Mail. I knew privatisation was coming and I was warned it was the worst office in the UK. I knew although we had broke up in the end I had made it, I had a job for life, I had unlimited possibility.
Leanne was inspiring though, she had come back from university and made a promotion in two jobs before we split
Leanne wanted to rush things, get married and have babies, I wanted to take my time and she couldn’t trust me, we was looking at houses to buy and I was walking a tightrope for her trying to keep her happy. I had to get a back bone and stopped having sex her at times, she gave me a black eye at one point and we just kept falling apart.
Gavin in the mean time had setup a business called Bespoke Bartenders with Rick. I was working and partying with them. I was working 50 + hours a week. I couldn’t keep my managers at work happy and my girl happy. I cheated. We ended. My managers told me to get out more so I went and slept with three girls and realised quickly it wasn’t the answer but my ego was back and I was a now a poser :)
I’m 21 now. :)

• Chapter Seven - Age Twenty One

Danny Swan came into the picture. He appeared at Gav’s once and we started drinking together. Danny Swan was the most popular in town who hung around with the rich kids & got all the girls. I couldn’t compete with them so I didn’t even try lol. I believed I was stupid and ugly. Always had trouble with women. Had issues with my hair & weight. We started drinking together every weekend, it was fun just dancing, smoking drinking and getting attention from girls.
I’ve always been constantly criticised & called stupid and ugly by friends. My step dad used to say I was gay and point at me saying look at him he’s thinking, he knows what you’re thinking, that stuck with me. Girls used to call me ugly and say it was because I was ginger. Lad mates would all call me stupid and put me down on everything I did, idea I had or what I owned, nothing was ever good enough. I have often been flabbergasted at everyone, noticed people’s insecurities stop them from being themselves. I’ve always felt like everyone expects us to prove something. I hate it.
I was being used by Danny for a good time and my car. I didn’t mind, I just found it strange his need to steal fifty p from me once. Danny rarely had a job and always wanted to go out. We started smoking weed. I was paying for most things but I didn’t mind because I was in with the popular kids.
Danny introduces me to Mat Wood, Dan Malloy & Tom Smith. May wood was a tattoo artist. Dan was the leader singer of a band & Tom had just slept with everyone in town. I knew about them all previously from Laura Dawes. They all loved making fun of me and wanted me around all the time. The single life had began. I slept with three girls and realised this wasn’t the answer. I was looking for something meaningful. I just set to live & have a good time minus the sex. I made lot’s of new friends & reunited with old friends. Life was simple until point. Everyone wanted a piece of me and wanted to know what I was doing. I’d always just yolo’ it. I’d probably met 50 new people in a year.
I was a man in demand. Me and Ricky had caught up again and he always wanted me round his. Ricky and his friends all worked and I had a lot of good to say about them. They looked to Ricky as the what would Ricky do kinda guy.
Tom Smith was depressed and I was a sucker that couldn’t say no so I was also catering to him and hanging around with him to keep him happy
I made time for everyone & everyone started getting weird around me. I started questioning everyone and everyone was calling me stupid.
I had changed & I wanted to find out what was going off.
I’m now 22 and it’s 2012 :)

• Chapter Eight - Age Twenty Two to Twenty Three

Danny introduces me to Mat Wood. He was very keen to give me advice and thought I was going through an awakening. He told me to concentrate on my breath. I was very angry at this point. I wanted to know why everyone was being shady around me at the same time I was trying to gain respect from everyone. This drove me made trying to get respect.
I was having trouble at work also. They noticed I had changed. I blamed them for the break up putting pressure on me to work too much. They would punish me every time I said no. I clicked on to their methods and started making them look stupid. The managers didn’t find it funny but all I wanted was respect. One postman said at a Christmas party I was the future of Royal Mail. People knew I knew something.
A year went by with all the stress from work and friends, I’d given up, I just wanted to settle down and find a woman. I was trying to say no to everyone. I wanted control of my life.
I’m 23 now and it’s 2012.
Mat Wood and Jaydee introduce me to zeitgeist. I become obsessed with it and watch it slowly. Watch a piece, meditate on it, concentrated on my breath and let the thoughts flow.
Suddenly bam. I had awoken. I had mastered life. All the dots connected in my life from past present to future. I was petrified I was going to destroy the world and everyone was out to get me for it. I was watching the whole world spiral around me from that point onwards.
I remember when my mind eclipsed I thought I was the last point in time.
This is my theory of everything :)

• Theory of everything :)

The secret to philosophy is, it is true if you believe it to be true. Philosophy is like taking the tomato and making tomato sauce. Wisdom is knowing it is a tomato. By these means, philosophy keeps getting closer to the tomato. We make purée then we make slices and eventually we find our tomato, wisdom. Basically all philosophy is bull**** around what could be true. Wisdom is the result of good philosophy, which stands the time until another cycle begins. Philosophy is the love of wisdom.
So for example, we look at a chair and can see it is a chair, wisdom, philosophy, we can see it is nails and wood. :)
Wisdom is the truth known consciously. Wisdom is basically what is with the times; what the crowd can agree upon, what has consistent value. As for philosophy, we wouldn’t pick an in coherent philosophy out of the air but, someone may have an experience that gives them a philosophy that is ahead of the times. It only works if we truly believe it. :)
So basically psychosis = differently sane. :)
Their’s layers to truth but everything is built on truth. Truth can have more than one answer but a limited amount of answers. Meaning it is possible to understand the universe. :)
We are unlimited awareness but what we are materialistically is limited so, in other words. Wisdom is limited. Philosophy is unlimited.
So therefore, a plastic chair cannot be a plastic chair because that’s philosophy, the chair is plastic or a chair.
ID = Our wisdom
Ego = Our philosophy
So, we are our actions.
What we have done in our past is what creates the Angels & Demons that surround us.
Angels & Demons are also manifest by the things done onto us.
So for example we sacrifice people to summon a Demon.
This creates our karma, Karma is when we don’t learn our lesson the same situation repeats until we accept our mistakes & make the changes.
Angels and Demons can be also described as what makes up consciousness. Angels being consciousness. Demons being subconsciousness, so, until we make our demons conscious we will continue to be controlled by them from our subconscious. Preventing us from being ourselves. What we have not made conscious is our shadow.
Angels & Demons are what create our personality We can think of the ego as presence and that be all our demons playing together.
Life is about growth, holding on and letting go. We gain wisdom from angels and demons.
To create a Demon we go experience something and start a ritual*, then we simply let our Demons out to play and let them possess someone else. Talk about them, write poetry, a short story or a lesson we learned. This way they lose their power. The karma is released. * A ritual is taking the long way home around an action to create a better result, we apply method to the madness, and take small steps into creating bigger actions. Like gathering ingredients to empty our minds of all the questions and gain the power to manifest something we want :)
This is us creating the capacity to fulfil our dreams. We take the steps towards our dreams. This is creating more space inside ourself for them to happen. Whilst we are doing this; we are attracting the reality we want, by implementing our intension we create a ripple that spirals back to us. This is how our thoughts create our reality. We’re forcing the universe to conspire in our favour until we master what we are doing and gain the wisdom from the ritual. “I am” is the beginning of all wisdom, what we say after these words is what creates our reality.
We are god, Demons are our imperfections we fear being seen by the crowd, the fears that control us, this is how we attract what we fear, we become what we hate.
Demons will always stay with us, they are out to get us, Angels are their to save us. Demons give us the challenges in life, Angels give us the wisdom to get through them. Demons be like our children, frenemies, we have to give them something to look up to. We can think of Angels as our higher self, the elders.
So, we are the sins of our fathers. In this sense we are an accumulation of our ancestors. Each generation naturally practices self control and has had a sense of good and evil. Meaning, we inherit less & less Demons and we’re acquiring more & more wisdom through generations over time until we enter heaven.
In other words we have to go through hell and defeat all the demons to get to heaven.
There must be an alternate universe running backwards. One where philosophy comes first we are drawing all our energy from, the void must be a wormhole our imagination is trapped in eager to be discovered.
Wisdom = time
Philosophy = space 🙂
Dimensions:
3rd dimension = action, material world
4th dimension = thought, dream world
5th dimension = no thought, spirit world
The universe is a mirror so there would be ten dimensions, because we are in the middle of the middle looking in at the middle
They say life is better understood backwards so, the universe manifest from one point, the 1st dimension but, the universe also manifest from the higher dimensions. The higher dimensions are bigger, so, we go down the middle and we would say the 5th dimension is the centre of the universe. This is where the universe started but, this is not true. This creates dimension zero which is the egg, so, we have the 5th dimension down the middle of the spectrum which is the sperm. The 1st and the tenth, all this this creates you, a little spec, a special creation, a little miracle, a 5D, 3D hologram but, we’re not alone. We was shattered at the start. We mirror again, meaning the universe started with a twin flame in the 6th dimension. Each spec is going across distance is flat, each made of 3 points so, each spec is made up of zero, the fifth and the 3rd. Space, time & matter, creating a 3,6,9 pattern in every direction. This is the 3,6,9 method. This means everything that’s possible that could be manifest, manifest at the start of the universe with unlimited possibility 🙂
This would mean each universe is contracting or expanding. That there is only beginnings. All life is game, the universe is like a Russian doll.
This would mean we are all born at the centre of the universe. We are born with all the wisdom of the universe and life is a journey moving closer or further away from the centre of the universe as we develop, discovering wisdom or not. We are the singularity. This makes us creation & creator. :)
We all have the Ontic Sphere,
“ Deep inside the being of a human life there's a secret connection to powers and forces, the refined and raw energies of the world and the cosmos beyond it, all funneling down and inward to that secret connection and flowing through the entire ontic sphere* of the human being, bringing more reality to the reality than it had before it was fed the true foods of existence, the blending of experiences and the feelings, and from the ontic sphere spreading out to all the world, radiating like a microscopic star the rays and beams of a formative influence, making the human being more than a consumer or a parasite, but a symbiote, a producer even of the transformation flows through the topologies shaping reality everywhere. This is a good purpose for human beings, enriching the very planet and it's planes themselves, and between them, even more special the magick, the sorcery, the craft, the very tales of love and drama, the majestic other dimensions of the being of the human family. Consciousness is more than a trip, it's a vital part of our present cosmos & chaos alike. *An Ontic sphere, to the best of my understanding, is the world which you live interplaying with your psyche and it's organic expressions, creating an almost ultrafractal and transfractal appearance and relevance to life.” - written by Jerry David Rosenberger
So in theory. Each solar system is like a little universe. There are possibly little you’s running around with one leg missing. Our imagination is a portal. All the chaos happening here right now, is all the chaos happening everywhere in the universe. We could be the first to leave the planet and it’s probably already happened. Our realist us would be immortal and complete all challenges in life. All life across the universe shares the 3D 5D realm.
Everything that exists inside the mind has already happened somewhere or is about to happen. Everything is a phase. Everything is a figment of our imagination. Life is but a dream.
We could say we all share the same dream and it’s a dream within a dream. Meaning we all share the same wisdom with unlimited paths of getting there.
This means we are all connected. Meaning we all have attachments, demons. This causes frustration & frustration is the door to perception. We all desire happiness & the more wisdom & philosophy we attain the more heavenly life is. We can take these steps, (Compassion > self control > reason) on the way to attaining wisdom.
We have the question do we have free will? On one side we say everything happens for a reason. On the other side we say everything is random. If we go down the middle we say, self control is a form of free will. Yes, the universe is determined but the more awareness we have the more choice we have. The middle path is useful for philosophy. The middle path may mean going a hard right to balance a weak left.
Gratitude is the state of mastership, so, we rather ask what is this trying to teach me? instead of why me? in moments of frustration. It’s important not to play the victim.
And then there’s the eightfold path.

1. Right understanding (Samma ditthi)
2. Right thought (Samma sankappa)
3. Right speech (Samma vaca)
4. Right action (Samma kammanta)
5. Right livelihood (Samma ajiva)
6. Right effort (Samma vayama)
7. Right mindfulness (Samma sati)
8. Right concentration (Samma samadhi)

As you can see consciousness is a manifestation of interactions. Our soul is an accumulation of our ancestors, all our and Angels and Demons. We are one soul, wisdom, philosophy, we are all different souls. We came here with lessons to learn passed down through generations already so, an old soul is wise, every generation is more advanced than the next. Children are the wisest on the planet, children know they know but don’t know what they know until they are older.
So, Alls life is is a story going back in time to understand creation. We are an accumulation of the past, future and present. Souls can come from other planets as well as this as we are time travellers. We all have the ordinance of the entire universe limited by our awareness.
Everything has its place and we want everything in it’s fitting place. Good and evil can be seen as a spectrum. Intentions come into play and even the observer so, there can be a greater good and a lesser evil. When a crowd come together we all get on a level, you get what you give, for some direction I suggest:
To do love onto another is good; out of love for yourself, to make one love oneself. Evil is to inflict suffering on to another; out of hate for yourself, to make one hate oneself.
We have three forces pulling us. We all have god, we are god, wisdom. We all have our demons, our path, our philosophy and we all have our idea of perfection that haunts us.
Everything is spiralling us :)
The 5th dimension is where we are all heading. Where we are all connected at the heart and have empty minds, experiencing things like telepathy.
This would be heaven. This is where we become free spirits. This is where all our wisdom & philosophy comes from. Everthing has a spirit, all matter and thought are a manifestation of spirit.
Archons are what set the limits on our wisdom & philosophy.
The greys are the Devine perfect beings from the future that we will all metamorphosis into. They can shape shift, time travel & take hostage in our mind like a parasite. Everything get’s smaller and closer to perfection. These are what create our negative thoughts the beings preventing us from completing our challenges. They feed off of negative energy; if there’s no imperfection, they can’t exist.
if we don’t pay attention to spirits, spirits lose their power, so, we can kill death. Fear is a virus, the root of all evil.
I assume you know what to do. Our purpose is to express ourselves in order to understand ourselves and the universe. I suggest you be yourself.
This is how habits create the man. :)
We are a result of our life choices.
Knowledge is power.
Bonus:
Ten Commandments
Rule one Trust no one
Rule two Serve a brew
Rule three Dance with me
Rule four Don’t ask for more
Rule five Learn to dive
Rule six No quick fix
Rule seven Love comes second
Rule eight Always be straight
Rule nine Do not wine
Rule ten Master your zen